Kaspieman's blog

Celebrity

2011-06-08T16:33:00.003+01:00

The definition of a Celebrity: The definition of a celebrity – someone who works extremely hard to be well-known and recognised, and when they are, wears a flat cap and dark glasses to avoid being recognised. Regarding the recent revelations in the media about the extra-marital affairs of the Premiership footballer Ryan Giggs, all I will simply say is the following... Famous and rich people who have everything and cheat and star fuckers or gold diggers, who they cheat with, are as bad as each other as far as I am concerned. End of.

Four Things Make Us Who We Are

2011-03-05T16:19:00.006Z

For me, four things shape us in life - The genes you inherit at the moment of your conception, your upbringing, the environment in which you grow up in and the experiences in life which you undergo.

There is nothing you can do about that. Some people are very, very lucky in the gene pool. Some people are quite lucky. Others have average luck, and some are unfortunate. Certain individuals appear to have an inbuilt resistance to illness and disease. This is illustrated when a person smokes 40-cigarettes a day, is an heavy boozer, eats what they want, and lives to a ripe old age, ie, their late 80's or 90's or even more.

In contrast, some people have never smoked or drank and have died of Cancer in their 40's or 50's, or have been struck down with other illnesses, such as Motor Neurone Disease or Multiple Sclerosis. Illnesses and disabilities can run in families and so can certain personality traits or skills and abilities, whether they are musical, artistic to draw, or write well, or spatial intelligence and ability, or driving skills. I have long maintained that Autism is genetic and caused by other factors. If it is caused by the MMR jab, then everybody should be Autistic. There was no MMR jab until October 1988. How can that theory account for people on the Autistic Spectrum, such as myself, and others before me? How can a single jab alter the structure and wiring of your brain?

I also believe that your upbringing can shape you, as can the environment in which a person grows up in. If a school pupil, regardless of their innate ability or intelligence, grows up in a solidly, staunchly, working-class estate, as I did, then s/he, more likely if he, to stand out if they have academic aspirations, such as doing A-levels or University, as the majority of people on the estate could have aims of learning a trade, or working in a factory, or just getting out to earn a wage and doing anything, even painting pylons or working in a condom factory. Well, ok, not in those jobs, but you get my drift don't you?

Tony Harrison, a poet from Leeds, wrote about this issue in his poem "Book Ends", concerning the language differences between himself, a Grammar School boy, and his father. If the parents haven't had much education themselves, they can't motivate or push a child in that direction, or help with homework, in for example, a subject in Mathematics such as Indices, or Algebra, or Calculus, or Geometry, or Trigonometry, if their education and versing in that sphere, pardon the pun, has been limited to fractions.

It will be more difficult for the parents to help in Chemistry or Physics, if they haven't been educated to this level. It is a proven fact, in life, that upper and middle-class pupils fare better in education than working-class and poor ones. Of course, not everybody has academic ability. Of course, some people are clever in different ways, like in a practical level or at other subjects, but there is a strong correlation between succeeding at school and social class. More affluent parents can afford to pay for private tuition for a child who is struggling or who just needs a little push, in one subject, or subjects. Middle and upper-class parents are more likely to be angry or disappointed with poor or mediocre school reports than working-class or poor parents.

If your parents were university educated, then the pressure will be more on you to go to University also. You might respond, "Yes, well, that might have been the case 50 years ago or more, but not as much now". However, it still can occur nowadays. Children are usually expected to fulfill their parents ambitions and expectations.

Of course, you can be shaped by your upbringing, in that if your parents have always gone on holiday abroad, you will grow up thinking that is the norm.

Your experiences in life can shape you. If someone has had a lot of bad luck in their life, whether in love or in employment or just generally, it can affect their outlook. If someone has been in a relationship which has ended, particularly one which was close and deep, they may be so hurt by it they might never try again. Someone might have bad experiences in the employment world, and it can damage or destroy their self-confidence and self-esteem. Likewise, if they have just had disasters or failures.

Alternatively, if someone, ie, a famous individual, is surrounded by yes-people or sycophants, then it can warp or shape their views and beliefs, and make them think that they are infallible in their judgement. Politicians can become isolated and suffer a bunker-mentality, and become detached from the real world. Thatcher did during her final 18 months in office and to an extent Blair did. Both were victims of their success.

Success in life can make a person confident, but it can also make them believe their own lies or bullshit. When that does happen, you are in serious trouble. If someone has been bullied at school or elsewhere, the outcome can be different. It can make someone emotionally psychologically tough, as they can say to themselves, "If I can survive that, I can survive anything" or "I came through that experience in life, what the f**k can you do?". It can even make the victim better equipped to survive various crisis in later life.

However, bullying is not a good or desirable experience or aspect of life. No, no, no. Bullies are evil and it is an experience no-one should ever have to endure. It can drain away the self-confidence and esteem of the victim. It can make them find it difficult to trust other people or to make friends, or to form relationships, because they are frightened of it happening again. Bullying can cause Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Similarly, child abuse victims suffer similar experiences. Both can cause mental health problems in the victim or lead them to self-harm. It has also been known for some child-abuse victims to become the abuser when they become older, as they can take it into their minds that everybody behaves like that, particularly if it is all that they have ever known and experienced. Abuse can be a cycle in families, passed down by one generation to another, or at least, in years gone by, before awareness of child abuse became public and before it attained a higher profile. Nowadays, it is more likely that the cycle can be broken, but please never fall into the trap of believing that it never occurs and that cycles of child abuse in families don't occur.

So, various things shape us, and make us who and what we are, but I still maintain it is those four categories which are the primary builders of each and every one individual alive today.

Learn To Crash

2011-02-26T16:27:00.004Z

It makes me laugh when driving instructors offer crash courses in learning to drive. It doesn't fill you with a lot of confidence does it?

Nothing Really Changes - I'll Drink To That

2011-02-22T21:50:00.007Z

On the news last Thursday morning, 17th February, I learned that 15,000 year old skeletons have been found in South-West UK, and evidence has been uncovered that people in those days drank out of skulls. If booze was around 15,000 years ago, then there wouldn't have been much difference from today. Think about it.... nowadays, people often get drunk out of their skulls. Back then, they would have got drunk out of...... skulls. The words "Get", "Got" and "Their" are the only differences in 15,000 years. Imagine it though, "I'll have a Skull of bitter please" or "Half a skull of Lager"... perhaps that is where the Lager brand Skol came from. In fact, it would have been better then when boozing, because you wouldn't have glass shattering all over the floor if or when you dropped your skull, as you do if you drop your pint glass today.

Hanging on the telephone

2011-02-13T12:58:00.001Z

When you are waiting on a phone to talk to somebody, wouldn’t it be good if they had some kind of spoken Juke Box, where you ask for a song which you like, and the Juke Box plays it, and therefore, it makes your wait more pleasant, instead of listening to any tune they play.

Who's advice should you follow?

2011-02-07T21:45:00.004Z

In life, you can listen to so much advice and read so many books, but with everything, there is one person you should listen to most of all, and whose instincts you should follow, and that is yourself. There have been several times when people have told me not to do something, and I have following my instincts, and I was proved to be correct.

I usually analyse situations and make decisions on rational facts, but at times I go by the feelings of the situation, whether it feels or seems right or not, I might be able explain why or how I feel like that, but I have found when I have made decisions on that basis, I have rarely been wrong.

ADD as a Co-Morbidity?

2011-01-09T16:11:00.014Z

Eleven years ago this evening, Sunday 9th January 2000, I decided to get diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. I regard it as one of the best moves I have made during my life, and I dread to think what my life would have been like now if I hadn't been diagnosed.

Nearly five months later, on the 31st May 2000, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. I sought the diagnosis, got it and felt a lot better after receiving it. The diagnosis answered a lot of questions, and it explained, and still explains a lot of the problems I have experienced in my life, and which I have experienced as far back as I can remember, and which I experience to this present day.

At the time I was so grateful to receive an AS diagnosis that I didn't push for other aspects of my life to go any further. Since 1999, I have suspected, that I have ADHD or at least ADD as a co-morbidity. Studies often show that people with psychiatric conditions/disabilities have co-morbidities, and it has been known for people with AS to also have ADD/ADHD as well. Indeed, Tony Attwood, an authority on Asperger’s, says that about 75% of people with AS have ADHD/ADD as a co-morbidity.

Many people think that ADHD/ADD is about hyperactivity, but there is more to it than that. It is also commonly believed that it goes away or at least reduces in effect as you get older. Nothing could be further from the truth. ADHD/ADD is a progressive condition, rather like Motor Neurone Disease or Multiple Sclerosis, and shows itself in different ways as one gets older.

According to my parents and other family members, I was hyperactive as a child. I remember watching a programme about Luke Jackson and his family on Wednesday 30th July 2003. One of Jackson's siblings is hyperactive, and my dad remarked “That was you when you were his age”.

My litancy of forgetfulness is very long. Here are many examples.

On Friday 30th March 1990, at Secondary School, I left my coat on an armchair and walked home without realising it. When I got home, my mum inquired where my coat was. I finally realised that I had left it behind. Luckily it was handed in and I was able to get it back, on Monday 2nd April 1990, when I returned to school.

Weatherwise, 29th June 1992 was a blazing hot day with no clouds in the sky. I was listening to Radio One's rewind hour. At that time they played songs from a certain year for half an hour and then songs from another year for the second half.

The second half went to 1972 and they played "California Man" by the Move. I liked that song at the time so I taped it, jumped up and down, feeling high as a kite, and danced around the kitchen, and played it four times repeatedly after my Mother had left.

I didn't have a house key on me, but for some reason, my mum told me to put the house key through the letterbox after leaving. About three-quarters of an hour later I walked out and put the key through the letterbox as I locked up and set off. Nothing wrong with that you may ask. Well, I walked to the gate and realised that I had left the house wearing my slippers! I then thought to myself "How do I get out of this?".

I came up with a solution. I visited a late former neighbour of mine. aged 90. He lent me a pair of shoes but the problem is that he is a size 8 and I was a size 10. In fact, I still am. I was walking around in agony for the rest of the day.

On Wednesday 13th January 1993 and Monday 18th January 1993 I left my bag behind whilst I wondered off looking at books. That annoyed the then security chief. The library threatened to bar me from going in for that.

On the evening of Friday 19th March 1993, I went round to the house of someone I was friends with at the time. I suddenly realised I had lost £10. I told him and we looked for it, but it was nowhere in sight. I returned back to his house, and his mother came in, saying that she had found £10 on the roadside, near my house. We both told her that it was mine, and to her immense credit, she gave me it.

On Sunday 9th January 1994, I went to the Bulldog gymnasium (I took weightlifting up three weeks before), where I used to work out at the time, and forgot to put my coat in a locker. I worked out but by the time the session ended, I went into the cloakroom and it wasn't there. On Tuesday 22nd April 1997, I left a walkman behind, again in a local Library, and never got it back. It had been bought for me at Christmas 1996 as a present. I have lost my library card on six different occasions. I have also misplaced it on three others.

On Thursday 30th October 1997, I left my walkman behind in a newsagents. Fortunately, it wasn't a repeat of April, and the following day, I went in, and it was left behind. Then, eight days later, on Friday 7th November 1997, I left it behind at the desk at the Chronicle office. I used to get into conversations with staff members, ten to the dozen, about their birthdays, birthdates and day of the week they were born on.

On Wednesday 20th June 2001 I left a library book on a bus. I couldn't find it, after tracing my steps, and it wasn't handed in, so I had to pay for it. Fortunately, it wasn't an expensive one.

On Monday 9th September 2002 I left my walkman in an Internet cafe, where I used to frequent between June 2001 and April 2004. I got it the following day, where someone had, thankfully, handed it in.

On Saturday 24th January 2004, I left the same walkman behind in the library, but this time, I lost it for good. Five weeks later, on Saturday 28th February 2004, I went into town and bought "Q", the music magazine, late in the morning. I went into a fairly quiet pub around 12.30pm and left after drinking two of pints of Guinness. After walking halfway down the street, I realized that I had left the magazine in the pub. Then, later that afternoon I caught the bus home and ended up on the wrong one. I was half way up Sheffield Road before I knew I had done so. I got off and caught the correct one home.

Nine months later, on Monday 22nd November 2004, I lost my walkman (I bought it on Thursday 5th February 2004 as a replacement for the one I lost 12 days earlier) and to this day I don't know where it was or where I left it. I don't care where it is now. It was too inconvenient and bulky looking back.

On Wednesday 23rd March 2005 I handed in some clothes in for my parents to a shop on Eldon Street that mends them. I was about to hand a £20 note over when I suddenly realised that it wasn't there. I told the people working in the shop to wait. I walked down the Eldon Street to find it but it wasn't there either. I turned around, and incredibly I found it at the side of the road just near the shop. I quickly retrieved it and paid for the items. I was very, very lucky that day.

On the morning of Monday 4th April 2005 I put some toast in the toaster and went to the toilet. I had an idea for my website and rushed to the PC to put the idea on it. However I got so involved in it that I forgot and left the toast on to burn! That is how I am. I get so engrossed in one thing at a time that everything and everybody else seem unimportant.

On the night of Wednesday 31st August 2005 I was reading a book and went to bed. I got so engrossed in it that I forgot to lock the door, which remained unlocked until I got up the following morning.

On Tuesday 25th March 2008 I left my mobile telephone on a train after visiting Darton, near where I live, on an errand. I realised when I got off it that it was missing. I went up approached this woman, who aged about 21, and asked, "Can I lend your mobile phone? I have just left mine behind on the train? You can have my rucksack and my MP3 player if I can just phone my mobile". She replied, "Well I haven’t got much credit on it at the moment".

I counteracted with, "Come on, all I want to do is telephone my mobile to ensure that it hasn't fallen into the wrong hands. If I am going to steal your phone you can have my rucksack and MP3 player". She replied "Well sorry, but I you can't use it". I was agitated by this point so I snapped "Well I hope that if this happens to you, then someone doesn't let you use their mobile phone either". Afterwards, I could see her chatting nonchalantly to someone, on it, probably her boyfriend.

I got out of this by asking someone who worked behind the glass counter at the ticket office if they could telephone my mobile. The first three times it rang and there was no answer. I said, as I was calmly outwardly but inwardly I was seething with rage, "Well, it doesn't look as if I am going to get that back. I hope that if someone has stolen it, then someone does the same to them". The guard replied, well we have had telephones, coats, bags, MP3 players and more handed in here. It is not looking good but just hold".

To add further insult to injury, a Policeman came into the office and asked me if the rucksack was mine. I replied, "Yes it is. Why, do you want to search it?". He answered, "No, but keep it with you at all times. I accept you are honest and genuine but you have to be careful nowadays". The bag was a few feet away from where I was stood.

Finally, on the fourth call, someone answered and he was going to hand my telephone in to the lost property office.

On the morning of Friday 20th March 2009, I went to the local shop to get some bread, butter and milk, and when I got there, I realised I did not have my house keys with me, so I walked back in the hope that no-one had got in. As it happened, they were left in the door, but I was very, very, lucky that no-one had seen them. I did the same on Saturday 4th April 2009, but I got to the gate and realised what I had done.

On Tuesday 7th July 2009, a wet, miserable day, I went to the gym. When I got there, I learned that I had left my gym shorts behind. I could hardly work out in my jeans could I? So I went back, and brought my shorts. I then worked out, and had a shower. I set off, and then, half way home, found out I had left my gym key behind in the changing rooms.

On Christmas Night 2009, I had a shave with an appropriately named, electric Philips razor, and whilst cleaning the razors, one of the parts dropped down the sink. I never got it back and as a result, had to buy a new one, a Remington Microshave.

PROBLEMS WITH CONCENTRATION

In 1983, a school report stated that I was a "good reader who can tackle anything but tends to gabble and read to quickly as my mind is usually on the next line". The report also stated that I have a "Quick, lively mind".

A junior school report from 1986, stated that I appear to be "A bit scatter-brained at times". Other reports, most notably in Secondary School, repeated that I lacked concentration, found it difficult to concentrate on anything, was a daydreamer or was a loner, which I am today.

In the past, when doing courses at college, instead of studying what I was supposed to be studying, I was in the library reading about subjects which were totally irrelevant to what I was supposed to be studying. You may assert that we all get distracted easily, but NT’s can do “boring” tasks. I just cannot.

If I am not interested, I can't do what I wish to do, or I find it very, very difficult, if not damn impossible. I have passed courses in the past, but I have had to devote all my time to them because my mind keeps frequently wandering, looking at items that were totally irrelevant to the task in hand. If I had concentrated better and stuck to it, I would have passed easier, would have achieved higher grades and had obtained more time to myself at the same time. At the end of exams, which I have taken in the past, my mind has felt like it wants to explode, because of all the concentration required. I dislike activities with extreme mental effort because I just can't concentrate or focus long enough.

I just cannot get motivated to do things, or can only do with extreme difficulty. I am one of life's procrastinators, even about things that mildly interest me.

I had severe problems concentrating and focusing when doing my ECDL course between 2007 and 2009, and I had to have a support worker to help me focus and keep up. It wasn’t the learning which was the problem, it was the concentrating and keeping focusing. A support worker was assigned to me, which I was very grateful for, to help with the other people in the group understand me, and with my interaction problems, and to try to keep me focussed.

My mind is rather like a cement mixer. I can almost hear by brain whirring constantly. My mind never seems to be still or rests. When I am writing, I often miss letters or words out, because I am so keen to finish off what I am writing.

I wrote that in March 2000 when waiting for my diagnosis with AS, I still have the 12-page report on which I wrote that, and it applies now. Yet ironically, when doing something, I can only focus on that one thing or do that one thing. I can't do several things at once. I am solo-channelled, as opposed to NT's, who think multi-channelled.

Another scenario is that inside your brain you have a TV Channel. For me, there are four different channels going on inside it at the same time.

If you are talking to me and my concentration span is broken as a result, I can become irritable. I have to give my all to a situation that demands my concentration, and it is often hard for me to regain that level of concentration if it is broken.

When I am writing, I often miss letters or words out, because I am so keen to finish off what I am writing.

I must get out what I want to say immediately because if I don’t, I forget it. I hate queues. I still often talk ten to dozen about a subject or topic which interests me, regardless if the listener is interested or not. Indeed, in May 2001, a psychiatrist I used to see, send me a letter in reply to some concerns and worries about things that were getting to me at the time, that he “Noted that I speak very quickly”.

My brain feels like it needs to be stimulated and entertained. It needs to receive written information, and yet when studying or reading, it loses interest quickly. I also feel sleepy after studying or trying to concentrate.

When someone is rambling on at length I often lose interest very quickly, and if or when you are talking to me, you have to emulate me, and get to the point very quickly, otherwise, you will lose whatever hold you had over me, and I will lose interest. I don’t take offence at someone’s frankness as long as they aren’t wasting my time, but stringing me along just makes me bored.

I frequently change TV channels a lot when watching a programme, even if I am interested in it or flick through them.

I may as well have photocopied most of my Secondary School reports to stop the teacher or teachers repeating themselves with my inability to focus and concentrate.

My mind always is ahead of itself and so is my speech, to the extent that I can mix people’s names up, because I try to get too much out at once.

When using the Internet I frequently have five or more windows open at the same time, as my mind keeps jumping between different sites. It just cannot focus or concentrate on any site for a long period of time. I look at one, get bored, looks at another, gets bored, switches to another site, gets bored and so on. I look at all and take in very little of any.

My head is always full of crap, even today. I wrote down irrelevant data such as people’s ages, irrelevant dates, numbers and things like that. Almost anything that is totally unconnected and totally irrelevant to the task ahead.

On Saturday 8th January 2000, I remember being sat with a group of people and one called me ignorant for butting in constantly. I asked him if he liked Chris Evans, and he replied, “No, no, I don’t. I don’t like irritating people”. Picking up straight away that he was meaning me as well, I replied, “Well, life must be horrible when you don’t like yourself”.

Another person said about me in 2000 that I don’t listen, and butt in constantly because for me, it is too much like hard work.

I always talk a lot through TV programmes if I am not interested about any rubbish in my head, relevant to the programme, or to my life or not.

I also talk very quickly. Indeed, in May 2001, a psychiatrist I used to see, send me a letter in reply to some concerns and worries about things that were getting to me at the time, that he “Noted that I speak very quickly”.

I always was, in the 1990’s and up to the late 2000’s, seen running. I would run everywhere, because my mind was so keen to get where I wanted to go faster. I used to run in the town centre, and people said to my mum that “Your Kevin is always running everywhere”. Once, in 2005, I was stopped by a policeman who asked why I was running. He asked my name, and told me that I shouldn’t, because it attracts attention, and I could be arrested in future.

I am always fiddling with my belt, making movements with my eyes, rubbing my hair.

I remember jumping up and down, feeling high as a kite, being upstairs, in early 1995, and the song by Blur, “Girls and boys”, was on a cassette I had. I played it repeatedly.

On the afternoon of Saturday 4th March 1995, my dad asked me on 4th March 1995 if I had been taking drugs because I seemed “high” and was talking fast and seemed quiet happy. Indeed, when at Secondary School, one or two pupils, on occasion, asked me if I was high on drugs with my behaviour, and once I was asked where I got them from.

On Tuesday 2nd September 1997 I was in a queue in McDonalds. I hate queues at the best of times, but because I was bored, I started dancing about, or attempting to dance about, and then I walked out.

When sat, I frequently shake my legs. This could be due to low dopamine levels in my brain. Another habit I have is chewing my tongue which makes me look like a goldfish.

Do you think I could have ADD or ADHD as a co-morbidity?

Human Intelligence

2010-12-27T19:20:00.003Z

For me, a persons intelligence is defined by how they learn from a mistake they have made. For example, if somebody makes a mistake, never repeats it again and learns from it, or can figure or analyse where and how they are going wrong, I would argue that they are intelligent. Likewise, if a person makes mistakes and never learns from the mistakes, or keeps on making them, I would argue that they are a very stupid and unintelligent person.

People who Aspies get on with

2010-12-21T23:24:00.005Z

I wonder why it seems to be the case that people with Asperger's Syndrome get on with people younger or older than themselves better than their peers or those their own age? It is a problem or issue I have experienced throughout my life, in varying degrees. This factor was more noticeable, and obvious when I was at Secondary School and in my late teens, but still is present with myself, even today, approaching the 11th anniversary of my AS diagnosis, at the end of 2010.

It could arise because in the Secondary School years, people are perhaps more self-obsessed, and obsessed with conformity, image and fitting in, and don't like anything or anybody which is not "cool" or doesn't fit in with what they deem to be the "Norm". In fact, at that age, some people are so far up their own backside they would form a circle. However, people can become more tolerant and accepting of differences in individuals as they get older, work, meet different kinds of people and generally and mix more. School is a rather narrow world and has narrow confines. Once they leave, many people develop on a mental, emotional and social level.

Perhaps it arises because older people are, as a rule, more tolerant and more accepting, and younger people don't judge as much. Another theory I have is that the special interests those with AS have are shared by those who are older, as they can be on obscure or specialist subjects. Topics or subjects which their peers engage in can bore them, so there is little, if anything in common between them. I remember my late Grandfather's 70th birthday in January 1991, and I engaged in a conversation about World War II with an Uncle of mine, who was 10 when the war ended. Everybody else was talking about fashion or other family members or just general bullshit that people talk about.

Wit isn't loudness

2010-12-14T23:16:00.004Z

In life, I don't think it is abnormal to be an introvert or an extrovert. I am neither, or both, depending on where I am and who I am talking to. Socially I am not a confident person but am when I speak up about something I am interested or care about. However, people seem to mistake wit for loudness. This is seen notably in working-men's clubs or even pubs. People try to be the Alpha man or woman in those type of situations. People seem to think that the louder you are, the funnier you are. I disagree. Wit is about being quick, clever, inventive, and funny. It isn't about shouting or shouting someone down, or insulting someone. That isn't clever or inventive. If I walk up to someone and call them a knobhead or shithouse, I am not witty. I am just insulting them. That isn't clever or original. Anybody can do that.

I am neither an introvert or an extrovert as a person. Half of the UK population are introverts, they just don't feel the need to shout about it.

Sharing a famous birthday is meaningless

2010-12-12T18:36:00.004Z

Knowing which famous people share their birthday with me is ok out of curiousity, but I don't think it means that much. Jim Bowen, Joe Pasquale, Benjamin Harrison and Steve McMahon have the same birthday as me, 20th August, but I am not a Liverpool soccer player, I am not an American President, I don't have a squeaky voice and I don't wear a wig and tell people "Smashing, great, super" repeatedly! For me, knowing which famous people share the birthday as you is a matter of curiousity.

Stephen Hawking, was born on the 300th anniversary of Galileo's death. Galileo, as we know, was imprisoned by the Catholic Church for saying that the earth orbited around the Sun, as opposed to vice versa, which many believed at the time. However, Hawking said that 2,000 other people were born on that day across the world, (Thursday 8th January 1942). Indeed, some of them may have been Dustbinmen, or Accountants, or Roadsweepers, or Electricians, or Joiners, or Mechanics, or Labourers, or Lorry Drivers.

So no, sharing your birthday with a famous person doesn't means that much, as far as I am concerned. For me, a person is shaped by four things. Your genes which you inherit at birth, your upbringing, the environment in which you grew up in, and your experiences in life.

Snow and how we handle it

2010-12-01T15:27:00.007Z

Usually, in the UK, we get heavy snowfalls after Christmas. White Christmases are very rare. I have known it snow after Christmas and on or around New Year's Eve on several occasions in my lifetime, notably in 1995, 1996 (When it snowed heavily on New Year's Eve), 2000 (When it melted on New Years's Eve), 2001 and 2003 (When it snowed heavily on New Year's Eve). It also snowed heavily just before Christmas last year, 2009, but thawed. More heavy snow fell early in the new year of 2010 though.

However, this year, heavy snowfalls have come early. The cold weather started last Thursday, 25th November. The areas which got it worst at the beginning were Scotland and North-Eastern England. I thought that where I live would escape but after going to bed at 12.40am last Saturday, I looked out of the window and saw that it was white over. Silent snowflakes were falling from the sky. By the time I got up thought it had stopped, but an inch and a half had fallen overnight.

Saturday was a bitterly cold day, and the mercury fell to -10 on Saturday evening/Sunday morning. Further snow fell Sunday, and it snowed Monday evening from 8.30pm onwards. Last night and today has seen the worst snowfalls. It started snowing from 7.30pm to 10pm, and from 10.45pm to 1pm today non-stop. It was heavy at times. More Snow is forecast for tonight and tomorrow and it will be a bone-chillingly cold night on Thursday. I have known snow like this before. Of course I have. I have known snowfall in November before, in 1993 and 1996, but it has usually been January and February when it has been this severe. In fact, 2010 has been the earliest for heavy snowfall since 1981.

My feelings towards Snow are that it is like Christmas, you love it when you are young. I liked it at that age, but as you get older you grow indifferent to it, or even dislike it. Snow and Christmas are synonymous with each other. For me, it is disruptive and gets in the way. I don't think the UK is equipped for the amounts of snowfall which most of us are getting at the moment. I hope what we have now is melted away with sunshine when the thaw comes because if rain melts it away, there will be a lot of flooding.

When we get heatwaves in Summer, we get sharks and tropical fish in the English Channel, but for some reason, Polar Bears and Penguins aren't making their way to the UK at the moment. It does make me wonder how they manage in Siberia and Russia with constant heavy and deep snow, but I suppose if it is all you have ever known, you get used to it and find ways to adapt.

One solution I have for football matches, is say Manchester United have a fixture against Birmingham City at Old Trafford, and they haven't played them away yet, what should be done, if no snow has fallen in the Birmingham area, is play the return match at St Andrews, and then play the match against Birmingham that was due to take place in, say, March at St Andrews at Old Trafford. That would save clogged up fixture lists at the end of the season.

Logic or Emotion?

2010-11-21T17:32:00.004Z

In life you need a mixture of logic and emotion to get by. It is not good if you have 100% one and 0% the other. I personally am made up of about three-quarters logic and one-quarter emotion. I know that is too much in favour of one, but you need a mixture. I do have and feel emotions. I am not an automaton. I'm just am not enough emotion, but I do have some, even though I have difficulty showing my emotions a lot of the time. I just am not a huggy-huggy, kissy, touchy-feely emotional sort of person. I don't pretend to be. Good or bad. That is me and that is what and who I am.

What and who I would rather be

2010-11-16T14:26:00.005Z

If I had to choose between the two, I would rather be unpopular for being who and what I am, than be hugely popular for being who and what I am not.

Christmases come too early

2010-11-02T14:54:00.003Z

Today, I noticed that shops and stores have Christmas Trees in. Some of them have decorations on their walls and ceilings, and one or two were playing Christmas songs such as "Pipes of Peace", which was about the goodwill shown at Christmas 1914 between the British and German troops at the trenches. That never happened the Christmas the year after, or the year after that or after that. No such goodwill was shown at Christmas during World War II either between troops of opposite sides. I have also heard familiar Christmas songs such as "I wish it could be Christmas everyday" by Wizzard and "Merry Xmas Everybody" by Slade.

I don't think shops should be allowed to put Christmas decorations up, nor should they be allowed to play Christmas songs before December 10th. By the time of Christmas, you get fed up of hearing Christmas songs and seeing decorations. Also, celebrities, such as footballers and music stars, shouldn't be allowed to write their life stories until about the age of 30. There have been, in the last 10-years, a glut of opportunistic, cash-in autobiographies by 20-year-old footballers and singers.

RIP The Walkman

2010-10-31T20:40:00.003Z

I see high street electrical stores are stopping selling Walkmans. I used to have one from the 1990's up to November 2004. You have to move with the times, but RIP the Walkman 1978-2010. Everything paves the way for other things. That is evolution. Without the Walkman, we wouldn't have Ipod's and MP4's. Big chunky records, led to singles, which led to cassettes, which led to CD's. Betamax led to VHS, which led to DVD's, which has led to blue ray. Perhaps they will lead to white ray or sting ray?

There is no gift about having Autism

2010-10-25T13:53:00.005+01:00

In this post, I am going to challenge what has become conventional wisdom. I don't agree with or like the view "Autism is a gift". It is said at conferences, I read it in books, people say it on Facebook, and it is repeated by people like a broken-record, and nobody ever seems to challenge or dispute it.

I ask why is somebody gifted when they might have General Learning Disabilities, can't speak, rocks, can't communicate effectively, flap their hands, bang's ther head and might have seizures with it? Nobody ever says Down's Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy or Spina Bifida are gifts, so why is Kanner's Autism?

When I see someone with Kanner's Autism, or Down's Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy, I don't mock or ostracise them. Perhaps that is the gift that Asperger's has given me, to make me accepting, tolerant and understanding of other people with illnesses, conditions and differences. I think to myself when I see them, "That could have been me if things had turned out slightly differently". Sadly, some people seem incapable of such thought.

However, Autism is a disability, but a hidden one. Down's Syndrome and Cerebral Palsy are disabilties, but visible ones. Autism is NOT a gift. Anybody who is says that it is are talking out of their arse. Repeat, Autism is a disability, but one that is made worse when there is no early diagnosis, provisions and support and understanding.

You've changed

2010-10-23T17:18:00.003+01:00

If anybody ever says to me "You've changed". I reply, "I hope that I have. I would hate to think that I am still the same as I was when I was 12 or whatever".

The Only Boss To Sack Somebody Who Isn't An Employee

2010-10-10T14:41:00.003+01:00

The Apprentice, the Reality TV show which was first broadcast on BBC 1 on Wednesday 16th February 2005, has began its sixth series.

For those of you who don't watch it, or are unfamiliar with it, there are 16 contestants, and the winner obtains an £100,000-a-year position as an apprentice to the British millionaire businessman, Lord Sugar, who was, until 2009, known as "Sir Alan Sugar". I watched the first two series but don't anymore.

The contestants are divided into two teams, initially by gender (as candidate numbers are whittled down, the composition of the teams is periodically rearranged). The teams are then given a series of business-themed tasks designed to test their skills in salesmanship, negotiation, requisitioning, leadership, teamwork and organisation, with each episode covering a single task. At the start of each episode, both teams choose a project manager to act as the team leader for the duration of the task.

When the task is completed, the candidates have to report back to the boardroom, where the team members are usually asked to comment on the performance of their team leader, and the team leaders are asked how they felt that their team members performed. It is then revealed which team has won. Members of the winning team are told by Lord Sugar that he has laid on a special treat for them.

The losing team are sent outside and meet at the Bridge Café where they generally discuss their failures. When they return to the boardroom they are subjected to an interrogation led by Lord Sugar, who dismisses a candidate, who appears to have been the weakest performer, or it can be the Team Leader if, s/he has performed inadequately, with the catchphrase, "You're fired!".

The fired candidate is shown being despatched into a waiting taxi for the "journey home", and is briefly interviewed in the taxi to reflect on his or her rejection from the competition. The surviving candidates are sent back to the accommodation that is provided for the duration of the show.

One gripe I have with the show is that when Lord Sugar tells someone that they are fired, I find it a bit odd, as they aren't actually working for him. Why doesn't he say something like "I don't think you are up to it, goodbye?".... or "You aren't what I am looking for". It's like me going for a job interview and being told that I have been fired afterwards because my application was unsuccessful. They must be the first ever people to be fired from a job they don't have!.

The 21st Century Freakshows

2010-10-05T15:16:00.004+01:00

Programmes such as Jeremy Kyle give the ill, poor, disabled and unemployed a bad name, as people watch and stereotype, and think that every poor, ill, disabled or unemployed person behaves like the half-wits or f*ckwits who go on there, when for me, at least half of them are either actors or attention-seekers who will do literally anything to get on TV. For me it is the equal of the Victorian freak show, like when they used to pay to watch bearded ladies and the Elephant man. Look at some of the Big Brother contestants or those who blatantly can't sing who appear on the X-factor in the early stages. On the X-factor there was once a 72-year-old man with a whit...e beard who went on reciting a poem a few years ago.

Other similar "Freak shows" are those such as "My 20-stone tumour", "The fastest man with no legs", "How I passed my driving test at the 74th attempt" and "My life after 20 heart attacks and eight heart stoppages". This is, for me, nothing but sheer car-crash TV.

Redundant Words

2010-10-03T10:28:00.004+01:00

Isn't it amazing how people use redundant words and phrases or ask redundant questions, and don't really know they are doing it? When people look at old photographs of themselves which were taken years ago and ask "Was that me?" when they know very well it was. Years ago, a friend of mine phoned up. My mum answered and said hello. She told me who it was and when I put down the phone, she asked "Was that so-and-so"... I replied, "Well you have just said hello to him, so yes it was".

I have found what I'm not looking for

2010-09-30T22:47:00.004+01:00

Isn't it odd the amount of times you find something when you aren't looking for it. Last Thursday night, I was having a massive clear-out and in one of my drawer's I found an HMV voucher for £20 which I had since May this year. I had thrown it in there and other things had also been put in. I couldn't find it and gave it up as ...lost!

Are exams getting easier?

2010-09-09T22:59:00.005+01:00

Last month, the GCSE and A-level results were produced, and record scores were obtained by those sitting them. Of course, those who sat them should have been congratulated. However, one can't help but feeling that they have had an advantage over people born 15, 20, 30 years earlier, or older, as nowadays, the Internet provides a lot of information and makes revision easier, with advice, techniques and information on exams. Nowadays in schools, they have homework clubs, mentors and coaches. These were unheard of when I was at Secondary School.

At least where I live, there is a unit called Springwell, where all the troublecausers, disruptive pupils, thugs and shithouses are sent. That was one problem when I was at Secondary School. Such pupils would kick off and disrupt a lesson, and the Teacher would spend 10-15 minutes dealing with them. That of course, would be 10-15 minute Teaching time wasted. I have heard that the standard of GCSE's from 15 or 20 years ago were like the first year of A-level's now. Who knows? However, I am not one for saying "I'm in my day" or "Those were the days", or "Your school or teen years are the happiest days of your life". I look forward generally, not back.

Hayfever

2010-06-29T23:48:00.007+01:00

The sunny and hot, but very niggly, sticky and close weather we have been having, and an high pollen count has meant that my Hayfever has been playing up again. This morning I woke up at 3.15am coughing and wheezing. I Fell asleep again though at 3.45am and slept through. Sunday night was bad, as I woke up at 3am, and I didn't fall asleep until 4.30am, though I am not the best of sleepers at night, even when I am in 100% health.

I was severely affected during June, July and early August 2006. My throat was tickly and dry all day, particularly at night, when I couldn't breathe. I was having to drink pints of water when I woke up at night that summer to wet my arid throat. I also had several coughing bouts that summer and it was the worst I have known, before or since. It eased when the weather turned cooler in mid-August.

My eyes were stinging a bit yesterday. However, hayfever and myself are no strangers. I was first struck down with in June 1979, when I was nearly 3 years of age. I had it severe in my early years. I remember my nose and eyes running like Linford Christie, and taking Sudafed. By now, I am used to it. I just find that some summers I get it worse than others.

People say that thunderstorms clear the air during humid weather. THEY DO NOT. All they do is make the atmosphere more humid, particularly when it rains. What "clears" the air is a change of wind direction. If there is a moist, humid, South-Westerly or Southerly wind, and the wind changes to the West or North-West, it becomes cooler and drier. If there is an Easterly wind in summer, it is a drier heat.

Abused? You don't know the meaning of the word?

2010-06-27T13:01:00.002+01:00

Does anyone find that the word "Abused" or "Abuse" has become misused like "Eccentric" or "Genius"? Say if someone called me a Tosser, I wouldn't say they had abused me, I would say that they are ill-mannered. Yet that is often classed as "Abuse". No, abuse for me is being raped, sexual abuse, being repeatedly physically or mentally bullied. I just feel many people are getting too soft. I heard last week of a woman getting counselling because she got a parking ticket! No, the perjorative term of "Abuse" is an insult to someone who has been genuinely abused.

The Budget

2010-06-23T12:20:00.014+01:00

In the last 100 years, the UK has had five unelected Prime Ministers. They include Neville Chamberlain in 1937, Alec Douglas-Home in 1963, James Callaghan in 1976, Gordon Brown in 2007 and David Cameron in 2010. Cameron was different to the previous three in that he faced the electorate, but didn't win a majority of seats. He formed a coalition with the Liberal Democrats, so he is still an unelected Prime Minister and will remain so until he wins a majority of seats at the next General Election.

In fact, in the UK, no party has come close to achieving 50% of the votes cast since Labour in October 1951, and they lost. Both Labour and Conservative have won with 55%-60% of the electorate voting against them. That includes Harold Wilson with a majority of 97 in 1966, Thatcher, who had landslide majorities of 144 in 1983 and 100 in 1987, or Blair who had landslide majorities of 178 in 1997 and 167 in 2001. That isn't a majority government!

On Tuesday, the new government announced an emergency budget as the UK is apparently Trillions of pounds in debt. I felt it was an ideological budget. Some pain was inevitable and unpopular measures were going to have to be made, but the pain is going to be worse for some than others, and they are the usual targets - the ill, the disabled, the poor and the working-class, who will suffer most for a recession/depression caused by millionaire, public school bankers through their greed.

You might ask, "What do you mean? We are all in it together". Perhaps this government needs to go back to school because they are confusing "We are" for "You are". VAT has been put up on items from 15% to 20%. This is an indirect, stealth tax, which will hurt the poor more than the wealthy. It is due to be implemented in January 2011. Amenities and council services will be slashed, again hitting the poor the hardest. Child Benefit has been frozen. Why don't they means test it so the rich don't get it or freeze it for the rich but give rises to the poor? Why don't they increase the wages of lower paid staff in the public sector but freeze those of highly paid staff for three years?

Also announced has been swingeing cuts in public spending, and ALL new and existing individuals who receive Disability Living Allowance will have to go in front of a panel to prove that they are entitled to it. DLA is hard enough to apply for in the first place. What if that panel knows nothing about the effects of a disability affecting an individual who has applied for it? There are more people with Autism than familiar and visible disabilities such as Down's Syndrome or Cerebral Palsy, but it is still a hugely misunderstood condition, as is Asperger's Syndrome.

This is why it is paramount and vital, now more than ever, that training occurs in Autism and Asperger awareness, for the benefits agency and tribunals. It needs to start NOW. TODAY. Too many people with Autism and AS receive no support from social services, and are shunted between the Mental Health and Traditional Learning Disability services. If someone with AS goes in front of a tribunal to apply for DLA after 2013, and they have no support or social worker, the panel, who might be ignorant in Autistic Spectrum Conditions, may conclude that the needs of the person applying can't be that great or desperate. If they were, they would have a support or social worker. Due to that, DLA might be withheld. Autism and AS are also invisible disabilities, like mental health problems are.

I also feel that this government will, as soon as they get the chance, cut the top-rate of tax in the UK from 50% to 40%. I also feel that they will bring in massive increases in the civil list for the Royal Family, so people such as Prince Edward, whose achievements include getting into Cambridge University despite getting a C and two D's at A-level, quitting the Royal Marines because they were too tough, taking part in "It's a knockout" on TV circa 1987, filming Prince William at University and being President of the Lord Taverners, Lord Hangeron and Lady Leecher can get more money from the tax payer.

The government is saying "The benefit system needs reforming and it needs to be made difficult to get benefits because the system always gets abused. Think of how many hospitals and schools we could afford if we weed out fraudsters". Yet when you call for the rich to be taxed more, or non-doms to be taxed or loopholes or offshore trusts to be closed, and millionaire, public school bankers, who have got the UK into the recession/depression that it is in now, to be taxed on their bonuses, or the Civil List to be frozen, you are accused of practicing the "Politics of envy".

Just think how many hospitals and schools we would have if bankers were taxed on their bonuses, or non-doms were made to pay tax or if taxloopholes were closed and offshore trusts and accounts closed down. The far-right, war-mongering, anti-Trade Union, racist, homophobic rag the Scum is extremely hypocritical. It attacks benefit fraud and measures to be implemented so it is very difficult to claim for benefits. It also attacks Asylum seekers and immigrants. It is run by an Australian based American whose company, News International, last paid tax into the UK Treasury in 1987!

You might ask what I would have done. I would apart from the measures I have stated, bring in a tax so those earning >200k a year pay 55% tax and those earning >300k or more 60% tax. I would have left VAT as it was and DLA alone for ill and disabled people who need it.

The Tories have always made scapegoats at those at the bottom, particularly if or when things go wrong with the economy, or for society's ills. Look at their history. In the past, they have targeted coloured people, homosexuals (Section 28), the unemployed, and does anyone remember the war in the early '90's on single parents or John "Back to basics" Major. They are carrying on where they left off. Their election campaign for 2015 or whenever it is should be "VOTE TORY: BASH THE NEEDY TO AID THE GREEDY".

DLA is being severely restricted. What and who will be next?

Government for the people by the people? A budget for shithouses by shithouses more like. Welcome to compassionate conservativism 2010.

The Internet becoming an illness

2010-06-20T21:09:00.002+01:00

I know there is a mental illness called Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. I wonder in the Textbook of Psychiatric illnesses, conditions and disorders, in years to come, there will be a term labelled Facebook-Obsessive Disorder or Internet-Obsessive Disorder?

The Rationale In Taking Heroin

2010-06-13T17:41:00.005+01:00

I have never been able to work out why celebrities, in good health, who are multi-millionaires, in happy relations, take luxury holiday, live in big houses, drive top of the range cars, want to f**k themselves up with drugs. I would hate to be harrassed by the media, but the same has applied to a few lottery winners who aren't famous.

If I was rich, I would be too busy enjoying myself to bugger myself up with Heroin. Why perfectly healthy and fit people want to make themselves ill by becoming Heroin Addicts, particularly stars who have it all, or lottery winners, but to an extent, anybody in life, when there are ill and disabled people or frail, elderly people who can hardly walk, who would love to be in their position is beyond me.

I feel it is an indirect insult to those who are like that. I don't get shocked that people find Drug use perfectly rational and sane and yet people with Asperger's and Autism are classed as insane, because I find many views the majority hold to be odd and irrational, and that is one of them, just as stealing cars can be viewed as socially acceptable, or getting drunk and smashing property is. If my views make me insane, than I am pleased I am mad...

It must be that some people are never happy or never have enough. I would hate being famous, being recognised everywhere I go or pestered.. but the money would be nice!

Why Bother Having MBE's/OBE's/CBE's?

2010-06-12T18:39:00.005+01:00

The usual honours list has appeared with celebs getting MBE's, OBE's and CBE's. I don't know why they don't reform it, with an Order of Merit or Achievement award or something like that... because Member of the British Empire stands for being a member of an Empire that ceased to exist 40-odd years ago. People also get knighthoods for doing a skilled, but well-paid job they enjoy doing for years and years. Is it right that they should, when people who have jobs that they dislike, with comparatively little pay, who turn in skilled and competent performances, don't receive any reward whatsoever?

Asperger Comments

2010-05-20T00:16:00.001+01:00

Here are a selection of comments I have made on the "Autism isn't infectious but ignorance is website" on Facebook..

One way that my Asperger's has helped me is that I don't get bored like NT's do, and many of them as a result turn to booze or gambling. This is often because they don't have many hobbies or interests. I have my obsessions or special interests, which prevents me from getting bored. In fact, it is very rare I do ever get bored.

Sometimes when in a public place, if people are talking about something which interests me, this has happened recently as I am tracing my Grandmother's family tree, I am tempted to butt in and start talking myself, even if I do not know them, and giving a monologue or an opinion on the subject. However, I steel myself not to. I think Sensory stimuli plays a part in this.

When people with Autism or Asperger's are being assessed for care needs, or provisions, it is usually in their own homes, which they know, which they are familiar with, which is often quiet and peaceful, and in conditions more conducive to Autism or AS. So therefore, an assessor will probably think that little or no care needs are required, and therefore turn the application down. An assessor needs to see how people with Autism and AS will fare in public situations which stress them out and mentally overload them.

It would have been hell to have had Autism or Asperger's Syndrome in 1910 or 1810 or anytime before. It wouldn't have been a perfect ten! However, in one respect, I feel I am fortunate in that I don't have Kanner's Autism, because as difficult as my life is, and the numerous problems I have, at least I can verbally tell people how Asperger’s Syndrome affects me and what it is like to have it. Some with Kanner’s Autism have the symptoms but can’t verbally let you know.

I sometimes think that technology of some kind would be useful to make people aware of Autism and Asperger's Syndrome: To make the invisible become visible. Surely we can do more to educate the public than wearing T-shirts saying "I am not bad, I am Autistic".

If I ever am on a bus or a train, I listen to my MP3 player and have small earphones. Nothing odd in that you might think. I never go anywhere without my MP3 player because it blocks noise out. You might ask "You say you can't stand noise and yet you listen to your MP3 player or the radio?". Well, I am only listening to one sound, whereas when I am out in public, I am bombarded by sound.

As you will know, I have got Asperger's Syndrome, but I don't go around everyday telling everybody I meet that I have got it. I want to passionately raise awareness of it, and of Autism, and I believe that Autism and AS get nowhere near the support, provisions and understanding they need and deserve, but I am not just Kevin Phillips a man with Asperger’s Syndrome, but Kevin Phillips, a human being, who like everybody else, is trying to make his way in the world.

I don't like it when I am in a pub and there is nobody in and no atmosphere. Conversely, I don't like it when you are being jostled, can't get served, can't sit down and can't hear what you or anybody else is saying. I never have been particularly a fan of nightclubs. I am fine socialising with a small group of people ...around me, but I usually avoid family functions and parties because I can't cope with large groups of people around me, mentally, emotionally and sensory. I am happier and more comfortable in a big library or the archives deparment of my library than at a party.

When some people ignore, shun, ostracise or insult or poke fun at disabled people, Autism, Asperger, Cerebral Palsy, Down's Syndrome, GLDers or whatever, they don't realise or have the insight or reasoning to understand is that it could have been them who was in that position or a family member... they are usually the ...types that who are so far up their own arse they would make a circle. Some bigots are supposed to be intelligent. In whose eyes? They aren't in mine.

People have said to me that they can't understand that someone so handsome (This isn't a sarcastic comment or boast) or as intelligent or as talented as me is single and unemployed, and that it makes no sense on either account. They also have said that my AS doesn't seem to affect me that much. The truth is though, there aren't many jobs out there, my self-confidence has gone in both areas, and they haven't seen me in an environment where and when my AS would be affected too much, such as a packed out bus or train or at a party.

The thing that sticks in my mind with the situations with many Aspies being out of work and doing nothing is "What a waste of talent and ability".

People with Autism/AS rarely fit into this world, but at times, I almost think that they are too good for this corrupt, two-faced and inconsistent world anyway.

Summing up the result

2010-05-10T19:41:00.010+01:00

The General Election has been held. I genuinely believed that David Cameron was going to get elected Prime Minister by a majority of 3 or 4. I was surprised that an hung parliament occurred. However, that has been the verdict of the British electorate.

It was a bad night for all three main parties. Obviously, it was bad for Labour because they lost 90 seats, and they obtained the lowest share of the vote since the 1983 General Election debacle under the late Michael Foot. When a party has been in power for a long time, the public tend to get cheesed off without it. This was shown last Thursday.

It was a bad night for the Liberal Democrats. The "Clegg affect" didn't materialise. Neither did talk of them making an electoral breakthroug. Quite the opposite. They lost five seats, taking their seat tally down from 62 to 57.

The Conservatives finished the night with 306 seats. This was their best General Election performance for 18 years, since Thursday 9th April 1992. However, talk of them winning in a landslide, which has surfaced a great deal in the press, didn't occur. They didn't win 326 seats which is needed for an outright majority. For me, in the last days of the campaign, they were acting and talking as if they had won already. Perhaps this turned voters off. Iut was a bad result for them. They failed to turf out an unpopular government, an unpopular Prime Minister and a party which has been in power for 13 years, and during a severe recession, despite Ashcroft's millions and fervent and vociferous media backing.

A notable result occurred in Brighton, with the election of Caroline Lucas, Britain's first ever Green MP. Nick Griffin, the BNP leader, standing in Barking, obtained 6,620 votes. The winner, Margaret Hodge, obtained over 24,628 votes.

There was a shambles, with huge queues in Manchester, Sheffield, Birmingham, Leeds, Liverpool and Newcastle. Many people were turned away, being unable to vote. After low turnouts in the two previous General Elections, perhaps they were expecting a repeat performance. It wasn't. This General Election had the highest turn-out for 30 years. This is why I think General Elections in future should be held on a Sunday, so more people have the opportunity to vote. More helpers should also be taken on at polling station to prevent a reoccurence.

The 2010 General Election, also laid an 18-year myth to rest: That a party leader needs the backing of the Sun newspaper to win. During the 1992 General Election, it appeared as if Labour were going to win, according to the opinion polls. They didn't, and the Conservatives were returned by a majority of 21, down from 100 five years earlier.

The newspaper that the deep-thinkers read, The Sun, put out a boastful front page proclaiming "IT WAS THE SUN WOT WON IT!". Blair courted the Sun's backing between 1995 and 1997 by promising he wouldn't place any restrictions on Rupert Murdoch's business empire and wouldn't return to 1970's style policies.

In September last year, the Sun came out in favour of David Cameron and the Conservatives and urged the public to do the same. It then ran some viciously anti-Labour and viciously anti-Gordon Brown stories and headlines. Notably the Jacqui Janes letter. Also vociferously in favour of the Conservatives were the Daily Mail and Express. The Financial Times, The Daily Telegraph and Times backed them, whereas the Guardian, Observer and Independent all supported the Liberal Democrats. Only the Daily Mirror supported Labour.

Perhaps the age of the Internet was why the public weren't swayed? Perhaps because newspapers sales are in decline was why this occurred? People can join groups on Facebook, join discussions on You Tube and other forums. Perhaps because the circulation of numbers has declined was why the public weren't swayed to vote for a Conservative landslide? Perhaps the Internet, in creating, energizing and formenting debates, was why voter turn out was the highest for 30 years? Perhaps it was relatively high because the public wanted to vote Labour out? Perhaps this was countered by people wanting to give the Labour government a kick up the backside, but alternatively, couldn't trust the Tories for form a Government as well? Perhaps the influence of newspapers was never all that great, and their importance in forming voting opinion has been overestimated?

The Sun and Daily Mail, having told Gordon Brown over the last two years, have been telling Gordon Brown to call an election so the British voters can deliver their verdict on him and his party, and that they would accept the verdict. An election has been called. An hung parliament was their verdict, and now they don't like it.

What will happen now I wonder? Who knows? Maybe Cameron will say to the Liberal Democrats that he will accept some of their policies, in order for him to implement some of his? Maybe Labour will say the same to them? Many people argue that it is a travesty that the party with the least amount of votes and seats out of the three (The Liberal Democrats) decide who forms the next Government, whilst the Conservatives, who obtained the most amount of seats and votes, might be in opposition. Morally it is unfair. However, these are the rules of the electoral system, and will continue to be so, unless something different or better is implemented in its place.

Whoever becomes Prime Minister, be it Brown, Cameron, that chicken who stalked Cameron during the campaign or someone else, will have a difficult job. They are going to have their hands tied, will struggle and will find it difficult to implement any policies, with the country in such a state. We are due to undergo a few bleak years ahead of us.

What do I think about Gordon Brown? The genesis of the recession can be traced back to the Thatcher years, when deregulation became the buzz-word. The bankers have been the main culprits. Gordon Brown has been savagely, and unfairly maligned by the Tory press. I feel he is a honest man with substance, and was generally a successful Chancellor. He was stupid to call Gillian Duffy a bigot though, in Rochdale.

Just as I don't agree with attacks on Cameron for his Eton background, I don't agree with the viciously personal attacks which have been made on Brown and his alleged personality. However, he didn't seem to fit in during the age of "X-factor" politics. Sad how shallow society is, when we judge a potential Prime Minister on appearance and style, but there you go. On a more practical viewpoint, I also feel that Brown has run out of steam. He has been in Downing Street for 13 years and it is time to let a younger man have a go now.

The Way I see It

2010-05-03T11:20:00.007+01:00

I have always said through this election campaign that David William Donald Cameron will form the next government and therefore, will be the UK's next Prime Minister. My belief is that he will scrape in by a majority of abour four. However, if I am wrong, then I am wrong. I am not rooting for him, just that I am a realist.

I personally would like to ask Mr Cameron, Mr Clegg and Mr Brown what they intend to do about Autism and Asperger's Syndrome, with provisions, support and help in society. I would demand straight answers, not waffle, subterfuge, going round the houses and evasion, all of which politicians of all parties specialise in. I would respect them more if they reply, "Nothing" rather than if they ramble and try to make out they intend to do something when they blatantly don't. I would respect each man if they gave answers, and any, or all three would go up in my estimation if they promised to do so.

My ideal government would bring in the following policies:

1) Get rid of the Royal Family. I don't dislike them as people. I am sure some of them are nice individuals. It is what they represent I dislike. The unearned wealth and privilege. How can we say we live in a democracy when we have a democratically unelected head of state?

2)Upgrade to a minimum wage for £7 an hour for everyone. The European Union decency threshold is £7.35 an hour.

3) Renationalise some industries such as busses and trains, and the water industry which are services. Some privatisations have worked, such as the telephone industry but others haven't.

4) Put a 55% rate on those earning >200K pa and 60% >300k pa. No return to the 83% top rate pre 1979 as that was too high.

5) Keep the social chapter for workers rights but have a referendum on some aspects of Europe. Keep us in Europe but not ruled by Europe.

6) Pull us out of Iraq.

7) Scrap ID cards.

8) Restrict severely but not ban immigration.

9) Ban Westlife songs from being played on the Radio.

10) Do more for special needs, particularly Autism which is a neglected condition.

11) Close tax loopholes for the rich and offshore trusts.

12) Scrap Trident, it is not the 1980's anymore.

13) Bring discipline back to schools and prosecute parents of delinquent children.

14) Keep the BBC.

15) Bring heavy and longer prison sentences, and make prison life tougher.

16) Link the Old Age Pension to Incomes not Prices.

17) Evict problem families from areas.

18) Jail Paedophiles and murderers for life.

General Election

2010-05-01T23:01:00.015+01:00

I have studiously avoided any mention of the General Election on my blog - until now. However, it is due to held this Thursday, and to have avoided it you must be blind, deaf or have emigrated abroad. Now, however, I am going to give my view of it.

We are now in the era of style over content, and personality politics. David Cameron, the Conservative Party leader, is undeniably a better media performer than his Labour party counterpart, Prime Minister Gordon Brown. Cameron is slick, smooth and suave. At 43, he seems to be a fresh, comparatively young man who offers change and a new direction. Brown, now aged 59, after 13 years in office, comes across in the media as dour, grumpy and tired. The surprise packet of the election has been the Liberal Democrat leader, Nick Clegg, who is three months younger than Cameron. Clegg was born on Saturday 7th January 1967, Cameron on Sunday 9th October 1966. However, we are electing a future Prime Minister, not X-factor contestants.

Clegg easily performed better than BOTH Brown and Cameron in the first debate. He landed some good verbal blows on Cameron AND Brown, who both kept saying, "I agree with Nick". In the second debate, I would say Cameron shaded it. Brown and Cameron gunned for Clegg, as did the right-wing press in the week beforehand, notably the Sun and Daily Mail, digging up anything they could use against him.

The third debate, though it isn't popular to say this, I felt Gordon Brown won it. He made several detailed statements, on policy, and stated what Cameron and Clegg would do with Tax Credits and in other areas. When he pressed Cameron on abolishing Inheritance Tax for millionaires, whilst making swingeing spending cuts, Cameron didn't directly answer, and basically ignored him, apart from saying it wasn't his party's immediate policy.

I can't see the logic in voting BNP. We spent six years, between 1939 and 1945, fighting fascists and Nazi's. Yet people are going to vote for a fascist, Nazi outfit. If that is the case, then people who gave up their lives, some in the teens, and many in their 20's, died for nothing.

I won't vote for UKIP. They should be called UK Isolation Party. They are mainly made up of cheesed-off, right-wing Conservatives. Many jobs depend on trade with the European Union. If they pull us out, they will be lost. I don't agree with the immigration policies we have existing with the EU. We should restrict immigration, and bring in a law that foreigners in the UK are banned from taking their money home. If they live here, they should spend their earnings here. However, I am not calling for an outright ban.

If the Green Party were standing where I live, I would vote for them. I like their policies most out of all the parties. Unfortunately, there isn't a Green Party candidate. Brown was stupid to have called that 66-year-old woman "A bigot" in Rochdale, and Labour have F**ked up over the Iraq war and Immigration, and the 75p rise for pensioners wasn't the greatest move they have made.

However, they have brought in the Sure Start centres, the Minimum Wage, which the Tories vehemently opposed, the free bus passes for the over-60's, Educational Maintenance Allowance for poor students, free bus travel for students, the heating allowance for pensioners in the winter, they have prevented the recession turning into a depression. They want to keep inheritance tax, which millionaires pay. The rich aren't taxed highly enough, but that is better than what the Tories offer.

Cameron may be personally committed to the NHS, but many in his party aren't. Can you trust them on it? What if Cameron is ousted in a coup by an anti-NHS Tory? Labour have brought in the 50% tax rate on earners over £100,000. Some argue that the middle-classes are taxed too much. I view middle-class as middle-earnings. Is £200,000 a year middle-earnings? I don't think so.

Cameron supports the minimum wage. I accept that. However, his party won't upgrade it. The Minimum Wage will be left to rot, and if the Tories are in for 10 years, it will be the equivalent of working for £2.50 an hour today, due to inflation. The Tories will also which will pull us out of the European Social Chapter, reducing or taking the employment rights of millions of workers and affecting the holiday and pay entitlements of millions of workers, agency workers and part-time workers.

The poor, working-class, ill and disabled will suffer with the swingeing spending cuts which will be made, regardless of who comes to power, but I just feel the Tories will protect the rich more and hur the poor most. There is one group of people who will continue to live in luxury - many for doing bugger all - the Royal Family. I don't like or dislike them as people, but it is what they represent I don't like. The unearned deference and privilege, and the hangers on in their ranks. I would get rid of them because I see them as costly and irrelevant to Britain. The Tories are obsessed with getting value for money, so why don't they cut back on them? Cameron also appears as if he is reading from an autocue constantly, rather than any passion or feeling.

I won't vote Liberal Democrat, because I see them as splitting the anti-Tory vote and letting in Tories, as occurred during the 1980's. Yes, I can understand the argument that only the Liberal Democrats offer change. Labour's been in power for 13 years. The Tories had 18 years, between 1979 and 1997. I am voting Labour on Thursday, not with any great enthusiasm, but because I see them the lesser of the evils on offer, but it won't make any difference.

We will wake up on Friday morning with David Cameron as Prime Minister and the Tories will rule Britain again, after a 13-year absence. The Conservative Party will win, not by a landslide on the proportions of 1945, 1959, 1966, 1983, 1987, 1997 and 2001, but by a majority of about 3 or 4.

When a party has been in power for a number of years, the public tend to get fed up with it. The public was totally and utterly cheesed off with the Conservative by the time of the 1997 General Election, held 13 years ago today. The Labour Party won by a majority of 178. They were fed up with the Tories in 1964, after 13 years in power, and I feel for that factor, they want to oust the present incumbent from number 10 Downing Street.

A Reversal of Positions

2010-04-28T08:07:00.003+01:00

As I have gone back to the 19th Century and before with my family tree.. I have noticed a reversal of positions.. in Victorian Britain, people were obsessed about death and sex was kept hidden and private. Nowadays, people are obsessed about sex and death is hidden and taboo.

Autistic Spectrum Conditions In The Media

2010-04-12T22:25:00.009+01:00

Last night, I watched that "Young, Autistic and Stagestruck" on Channel Four. It was ok and it highlighted the difficulties and challenges that individuals with both Autism and AS face everyday. However, I almost exploded when it said that people with Autism have limited imagination. They repeated that hackneyed, worn-out and discredited line once again, and why did it have keep focussing on one person. It wasn't all about him. In fact, it reminded me of the TV motoring show Top Gear, which may as well be called the "Clarkson, May and Hammond show".

It pointed out the basics... but in future, no programmes or documentaries about Autism or Asperger's MUST EVER MENTION people with either having no imagination. It is people who don't have an imagination who claim this, because they don't have Asperger's or Autism, so how can they know? How can they make presumptious statements like this?

The media is starting to stigmatize Autism and AS like it has mental illness. Often in the UK, when a murderer is arrested, the media say he has Asperger's Syndrome. Sensationalism like this just gets in the way and hides the real issues, which is help, support and provisions for those on the Autism Spectrum. Idiots like below aren't helping either.

http://blogs.reuters.com/great-debate/2010/02/04/did-aspergers-help-cause-the-crisis/

What is it like to have AS? I would like to know what it is like not to have it. It is like... "Hi, world... I can see you, hear you, feel you, smell you and taste you... but I don't know you very well!".

The Missing Link?

2010-04-11T13:16:00.013+01:00

When I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome on Wednesday 31st May 2000, my mum and one or two other family members suggested that my Grandfather, on my dad's side of the family, who was born on Thursday 20th January 1921 and died of a heart attack on Saturday 25th January 1992, had Asperger's Syndrome.

I thought this was a ludicrous suggestion, and I am sure that he would have found it as ludicrous had he been alive in May 2000. A man with nine children who had an extremely trusting nature and very well-liked in the local working men's club are not the hall marks of someone with Asperger's Syndrome.

Whilst my dad's dad didn't have Asperger's, I feel it would be wrong to not mention a couple of anecdotes about him on this blog.

In early December 1986, he dyed his hair, which was white and receding, jet black! My parents heard about it, and when we visited him on Sunday 7th December 1986, told me not to laugh and to say that it was alright. I fulfilled my deal, but at the wrong time.

Before I walked into his house, I shouted out, without even seeing his hair, "I don't care what the say about your hair Grandad, I think it looks alright". An NT of that age, or a similar age, would have waited until he had seen him before making any comment. My Grandad said, when we walked in, in response, "Go on, laugh, you might as well do, everybody else has. Frank Clarke (his friend who died in 1995), has dyed his hair and he has got away with it, because he wears an hat, but can Tommy? Can he hell".

Ironically, I walked into the corner of his living room, picked up a soccer book, and sat reading it oblivious. I genuinely didn't care about his dyed hair. It didn't make me laugh. In contrast, my parents went into the kitchen, shut the door and burst out laughing. I could hear them. My Grandad, who was hard of hearing, fortunately for them, couldn't. It was some time before they came back out to speak to him. As for my Grandad, he never tried to dye his hair again!

Another time my dad's eldest sibling, was asked what he thought to my Grandad's work., who had decorated their living room with wallpaper that were a lovely summery blue and gold roses on them. My dad's brother commented "It's lovely, but there is one thing wrong". My Grandad asked what it was. His son answered, "You have hung one roll upside down". My Grandad looked and said, "So I have. Well, that is how it is and that is how it will stop, and I am not changing that now for you or anybody!". He then left it like that!

I have traced my Grandmother's family tree. She is still alive. I have gone back to 1776 on her mum's side. They all come from come from York. I have traced her dad's side of the family tree back to 1727 or 1639, depending on the identity of one person. Between the late 17th Century and 1880 they lived in the Cleckheaton, Birstall and Gomersall areas of Yorkshire, before my Grandmother's Grandfather left the area, for reasons unknown.

I have looked tentatively at my maternal Grandfather's family tree, but I won't pursue it as I don't have the time, and I don't have satisfaction, as I will do with my Grandmother, of going up to him and telling him about his family tree, as he is not here. That is why I haven't traced my paternal Grandparents family trees. My mum's dad was born on Sunday 2nd April 1916 and died of a heart attack at home on Wednesday 31st October 1973, aged only 57. He was one of eight, two of whom died as children. His ancestors are from Chesterfield and Gainsborough. His dad was very intelligent man and at school they wanted him to be a Teacher. He was born in 1882 and died in 1962 aged 80. Stopping on in further education for working-class children in those days wasn't an option, and he had to leave school at the age of 13. He became a coal miner.

Whilst my dad's late father almost certainly didn't have Asperger's, I have come across some extremely interesting information from my maternal Grandfather's side of the family. I have always wondered, if Asperger's Syndrome is genetic, why I have Asperger's Syndrome, why I was singled out and where it came from? Dyslexia runs in my family but not Autism or Asperger's. I don't have Dyslexia. Most of my cousin's are NT, some of them crushingly and overwhelingly so.

John, my Grandad's younger brother, was born in September 1920 and died in June 2001. John died just over a year after I was diagnosed. I never met John, who never married and was apparently a loner. My Grandmother said he never hung about with anyone, was always alone and that it didn't seem to bother him. She said John never seemed to have a girlfriend. About 1997, my mum saw him in a supermarket and he tried to avoid her, and clearly didn't want to speak. He put his hand at the side of his head so that she wouldn't see him.

My Grandmother also said on Saturday 10th April, 2010, that he reminded her of me a lot. My mum's sister went to his house many, many years ago and knocked on his door. He answered and asked "Who are you? What do you want?". She asked "Are you John?". He said "Yes, why?". She inquired, "Do you have a brother who lives at such and such address?". He replied, "Yes, I do, why?". She said, "I'm your niece". He said "Oh, you might as well come in then". She said he was quite a nice fellow when she actually got speaking to him but was abrupt at first.

I need to learn more about this man and his life. Where did he work? Did he work? What were his hobbies? How do other people who knew him remember him?

I have come across interesting information on my Grandmother's side of the family tree as well. My mum's cousin has a Grandson with Asperger's. Whilst my Grandmother doesn't have Asperger's herself, she has a lot of similar personality traits to myself. Neither of us like a fuss. Neither of us like being the centre of attention. Both of us are happy to be in our own company for long spells of time. Both of us hold grudges for a very long time. Both of us have long memories. Neither of us like bullshitters or braggarts or show-offs.

Mishear the words of songs

2010-04-06T20:30:00.006+01:00

Isn't it odd how you can mishear the words of songs. I used to think that "Your the one that I want" by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John was the "Your the wizard of oz" because they sang it very fast. "Loveshack" by the B-52's was "Loveshag". I also used to think that the line "Feel like the one" in "Dakota" by the Stereophonics was "Feel like the worm".

I used to think "Bad Moon on the rise", a line out of "Bad Moon Rising" by Creedence Clearwater Revival was called "Bad Moon on the right". I used to believe that the Brotherhood Of Man song "Save all your kisses for me" was sung as "Save all your kippers for tea". I was under the opinion that "Imagine" by John Lennon had a line "Imagine all the people living by the sea", when it was really "Living life in peace".

Last Saturday night, I went to a musical called "Mercury". I never got to see Queen live, so a musical is the next best thing. I was, and still am, a fan of their music. For me, Freddie Mercury had one of the best singing voices in music. It is impossible to take Freddie Mercury off. His singing voice was unique and there will never be anybody like that again. However, the guy came the closest I have ever heard, and at times, if I shut my eyes, it was impossible to tell the difference. This is their website... http://www.mercuryqueentribute.co.uk/mercury/

April Fool

2010-04-01T08:52:00.004+01:00

April Fool! Today in 1957 Panorama put out a programme about people growing Spaghetti crops in Switzerland... and some people believed it! Perhaps people were less likely to question the authority of the media back in those days than now.

This is the link http://news.bbc.co.uk/onthisday/hi/dates/stories/april/1/newsid_2819000/2819261

I have wrote about IQ on this blog before. For me, it shouldn't stand for Intelligence Quotient, but Irrelevance Quotient.

Now the Education System doesn't work, it just makes you worse........

2010-03-30T22:52:00.003+01:00

I don't believe that the Education System works, because if it truly did, there wouldn't be such a thing as learning disabilities.

Sleep

2010-03-27T21:52:00.007Z

Replacing a soft mattress with a hard one wasn't the best move I have made, although the soft one was past it's best. I haven't had a refreshing nights sleep since getting the hard mattress on Friday 12th February 2010. By that, I mean the kind of sleep when you wake up and feel good. I need a lot of time to come around after waking up, though generally, I feel groggy for about 10 minutes on a morning, though this last few weeks, I have done so for a couple of hours after waking. I am not the world's greatest sleeper at the best of times, but action is needed, and that means getting a new soft mattress. My body, and perhaps my brain, it seems, has been conditioned to sleeping on a soft mattress. I also don't seem to sleep well anywhere apart from my own bed.

At the present, I seem to feel fully awake and alert in the afternoons and evenings, but I want to be so in the mornings. Despite this, I am delighted with the bed.

I remember one constantly sleepless spell I had between Thursday 28th December 2006 and Tuesday 13th February 2007. I remember getting up at about 4.30am on the morning of Saturday 30th December 2006, to learn that Saddam Hussein had been hanged in Baghdad. I didn't, pardon the pun, lose any sleep over his fate. I just couldn't sleep that night because I couldn't sleep. I went back to bed about 6.30am and woke about 10am.

I went to bed at just before midnight last night and experienced a bizarre dream in which I broke into someone's house when he has gone on holiday to read a stack of soccer programmes in a suitcase, and have stole some money and a few DVD's, and apparently have been getting away with it. Then Police were coming around nearby. It ended then because I woke up. Briefly, my body was paralyzed, but that ended quickly.

Another sleep related experience I have had is feeling tired at night, but when in bed, I have felt wide awake. I had sleep problems as a child, in between late August 1990 and early October 1990, and on occasion, in May 1991, I would, at about 5am, get up and go for walkabouts near where I lived. This was partly out of curiosity to see what happened at that time, and partly to exercise, because I couldn't sleep. I wonder if poor sleep is related to Asperger's Syndrome?

If a soft mattress doesn't cure this, then, I am either going to buy and read Sir Michael Parkinson's autobiography, read a 600-page book on Accountancy or watch a three-hour DVD on Cricket matches or party political broadcasts.

An American Surname?

2010-03-26T00:03:00.005Z

Last week, of course, was St Patrick's Day. As I stated, I have no Irish ancestry as far as I know of. I have traced the family tree of my maternal Grandmother, who was born in 1917, on her dad's side back to 1727 and have got to Birstall, which is six miles south of Leeds. Her mum's side, which I have traced back to 1803 so far, come from near York. However, my Grandmother's great-great maternal Grandfather, whose surname was Burrows, was born in Wigan in 1791. His wife was from Bingley.

About six years ago, I was sat in an Internet cafe, and two men were talking about their surname history. One of them said "I have got an American surname". I thought "Whaaaat? An American surname? How can you have? Does your lineage go back to the Sioux Indians?". Then it turned out his surname was Hatfield, the same as a place near Doncaster!

Unless Hatfield meant that he had some relations who lives in America, or were born in America and came over to the UK, and he didn't explain himself properly, I find his statement bizarre, as, apart from the Indians, the USA is mainly made up of immigrants, largely from England, Scotland, Ireland, Italy, Spain, Mexico, Germany, Russia and Scandinavia.

What does school learn you?

2010-03-20T21:34:00.003Z

I very, very rarely quote anybody else on here. Why should I? Nobody quotes anything I ever say or write. However, I found a funny quote from Mark Twain some time back... "I have never let my schooling interfere with my education" - and there is a huge amount of truth in that.

I have learned a lot more since I left school then when I was there..... I don't think school really prepares you for life after you leave, and the more I find out in life, the less I know. When you are fed up with learning, you are either fed up with life or dead.

Talking of which, a man last Thursday returned a library book called "Quatermass and the Pit" by Nigel Kneale which should been brought back in 1965. I still have one which from Secondary School which should have been returned on Thursday 16th November 1989, so I have about 25 years to go to beat him. I didn't steal it. I just forgot about it and found it years later.

I also watched Kes on ITV3 on Thursday night. If they had showed that in Hollywood they would have had to have had subtitles! There no need for special effects, extras, histrionics, dramatisation or bullshit... it just captured working-class life in a northern England mining town perfectly. I went to that Secondary School! What I thought was the bird represented his escape from the pit..... and then it was killed.. and that was his destiny.. a life down the coal mine and drudgery etc.

There is nothing racist about the Union Jack

2010-03-18T14:49:00.003Z

Writing about St Patrick's Day got me thinking. Every town hall in England should fly the St George flag, in Wales they should fly the Dragon flag, in Scotland the St Andrew (Cross) flag. What is offensive about any of them? How and why is the Union Jack or St George flag racist?

Now, if I saw someone flying a Swastika in a public place, I would protest about it, because it is a distasteful symbol. It is a criminal offence in Germany to fly a Swastika or give a Nazi salute, and rightly so. I also find it distasteful when people fly their national flags in their own garden or on the roof of their house. That to, represents some form of insecurity.

With my writings about us not celebrating St George's Day but yet St Patrick's Day, you may ask if I have become a nationalist or have joined BNP or UKIP. No, I have not. I never will. I don't vote BNP. In fact, I am a member of four anti-BNP groups on Facebook, but for me, the Union Jack and St George flag must be flown with pride, just as other countries fly their flags with pride. If people don't like it, they shouldn't look at it. If they think it is racist, then they should live somewhere else.

St Patrick's Day - but what about St George's Day?

2010-03-16T17:48:00.010Z

I think my ancestry (Phillips) on my dad's side goes back to Wales, but that is way, way back, more than 200 years ago at the very least. Most of my ancestry is English though. My mum's great-grandmother was born in Scotland. My dad's Grandfather, Thomas Phillips, was born on 6th January 1879 in Bloxwich http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bloxwich near Walsall. He, his siblings and parents came up here in 1890 for work in the coal mines. Thomas died on 10th January 1944. My Grandmother's mother's ancestors go back to York (to 1800) and her father's go back to Cleckheaton, or to the mid 18th Century at least.

Tomorrow (Wednesday 17th March) is St Patrick's Day. No doubt towns and cities across England will be teaming with revellers celebrating, with some of them claiming to be Irish or saying that they have Irish ancestry, though in most cases, the link is very tenuous. I have no Irish ancestry in me at all. Neither do I have any links with Ireland. I have never been there. I would even go as far as saying that on St Patrick's Day, there are some people who even claim to have Irish ancestry when they don't, because for some reason, it is sexy, romantic or fashionable to be Irish.

I personally can't see what is so great about being Irish or having Irish ancestry. Alternatively, I can't see what is wrong with being Irish or having Irish ancestry either. Having Scottish ancestry, Welsh ancestry, English ancestry, German ancestry or Russian ancestry or black ancestry is nothing to be ashamed of either. It is part of your history. To me, being Irish or Scottish or Welsh or German or any other nationality is like coming from Leeds, or Sheffield, or Manchester or London or Norwich. It isn't good or bad. It is just there.

What annoys me is nobody celebrates St George's Day, 23rd April. It is virtually ignored in England. St Patrick's Day has been a public holiday in Ireland since 1903. St George's Day should be one in England. The more public holidays or Bank Holidays the better as far as I am concerned. St Andrews Day, 30th November, should be a public holiday in Scotland and St David's Day, 1st March, should be one in Wales.

As well as St George's Day, another day that should be a public holiday in the UK should be the 11th November - Armistice Day. It was a public holiday in 1918 when the guns fell silent, and it should be one permenantly now. It also remembers the sacrifices were made in those wars and the civilian population who were killed.

What is my personal identity? A white, male, Aspie, who is from a solidly working-class background. No matter what I do in my life or how rich or poor I become, I will always be working-class, and I will always be Aspie. Both are part of me.

Exclusive: Depression is caused by being caught doing wrong

2010-03-14T17:57:00.008Z

Yesterday it was revealed that Mark Owen, the 38-year-old Take That singer, who is married with two children has apparently had ten affairs with other women, a drink problem and still smokes cannabis. After the scandal broke, Owen was admitted to a private clinic because he was suffering from "Depression" and to deal with his drink problem.

I accept Owen perhaps does have a drink problem. He certainly has a marriage problem, but I wonder why stars always seem to suffer from depression, and end up in rehabs or clinics AFTER being caught having affairs or doing drugs. They don't seem to be depressed at the time. Some people may say that Owen is trying to save his marriage. Having loads of affairs is a peculiar way of trying to save your marriage to me.... but it takes all sorts I suppose.....

I wouldn't exactly call the media and the newspapers paragons of virtue, particularly with some of the bullshit they write, but among celebs, I think "Depression" is a code word for avoiding the media. If the media were after me, I would become a recluse in my mansion, or would go on holiday to some obscure place, instead of claiming I had "Depression".

Owen isn't the only one who has claimed to be suffering from "Depression" when things have gone wrong in his personal life. In 1999, the comedian Lenny Henry had an affair and ended up in the Priory Clinic because of "Depression". I am surprised John Terry, Ashley Cole, Tiger Woods or Jordan haven't tried that one. Suppose there is always time.

If celebs don't end up in the Priory because of "Depression" after doing wrong, they offer a stereotyped answer such as "An error of judgement" or "Midlife crisis". Why can't they be honest and say something like "I had an affair, I behaved like a selfish tw*t but I will try to repair my relationship" or "Its not working between us".

Depression? True depression is an illness. It doesn't come on because you are celeb and have been caught doing wrong.

Being "Normal" can cause mental illness

2010-03-11T17:30:00.006Z

I believe that the causes of most mental illnesses are genetic. However, life today goes at such a fast pace, people don't take time out to reflect, to have time to their selves, and to unwind, and hence they can suffer from mental illness or stress. Also, I believe that some mental illnesses is precipitated by people trying to conform to stupid, invisible and unwritten rules which are placed on them. For example, being happily married with two or three children, having a good and fairly well paid job, living in a nice house with a nice garden and having a good social life is what society classes as being normal. Yet many people, for whatever reasons, can't or don't achieve this status in their lifetime. So therefore, whilst striving to achieve it, they can become bitter, despondent or physically or mentally ill. So, I believe that some mental illnesses are caused by people conforming to, or trying to conform to, stupid rules.

The Media's role in mental illness

2010-03-02T22:52:00.001Z

Last Sunday on Facebook, I was happy to display a ribbon promoting awareness of mental illness on my page. There is an amazing amount of ignorance against mental illness and most of it is perpetuated and stoked up by an irresponsible media who care more about newspaper sales than the truth.... with banner headlines such as "Knife wielding Schizo kills" instead of "Knife wielding Sociopath kills" (Sociopaths aren't mentally ill. They have a personality disorder and are in full control of their reasoning). The old chestnut. Mental illness equated with violence and homosexuality equated with paedophilia or AIDS.

When it comes to portraying mental conditions in the media, glaring headlines, or two-page spreads in tabloid newspapers screaming "Knife Wielding Schizo kills", it seems, sells more papers than reporting the truth concerning every day struggles for those with a condition, and how it has affected any individual with it.

You may answer "Yeah, but it sells newspapers dunnit?". It might do, but it is also a sad reflection of our society. Nowadays, sensationalism, witch-hunting and distortion matter more than the fact and truth. However, you blame the people who buy the newspapers as much as the individuals who put out this genre of reporting.

Whilst sensationalism sells newspapers, it also serves to inflame bigotry and prejudice against those with mental illnesses and neurological conditions. It leads to incorrect stereotypes formed in the minds of readers.

Bring back the Rock and Roll years

2010-02-28T18:22:00.009Z

I know there are issues with broadcasting, and copyrights, but I think it is time the BBC brought out a Rock n Roll years series for the nineties and naughties. The last time this programme was shown on TV was one for the 1980's - between Wednesday
2nd March 1994 and Wednesday 27th April 1994. The rock stars have more money than what they need, so what does it matter to them? It is better than programmes with loads of talking heads on. Who cares what some z-list celebrity thought to chopper bikes in the 1970's or BMX's in the 1980's?

Here are some shows of the Rock and Roll years... for...
1974....
http://www.veoh.com/search/videos/q/Rock+
and+Roll+years#watch%3Dv6559148H6SDFk93
1976 (The year I was born - on 20th August at 10.05am).
http://www.veoh.com/search/videos/q/Rock+
and+Roll+years+1976#watch%3Dv1297796xa8SkKTr
1978 (The year one of my regular blog comment makers was born)
http://www.veoh.com/search/videos/q/Rock+
and+Roll+years+1978#watch%3Dv11824486wbFDBSQ
1967
http://www.veoh.com/search/videos/q/Rock+
and+Roll+years+1967#watch%3Dv1821555tYj2a2Hk
1962
http://www.veoh.com/search/videos/q/Rock+
and+Roll+years+1962#watch%3Dv1821351gH4bxkca

Book shops

2010-02-28T18:20:00.002Z

I hear that Readers Digest has gone into Administration. Let's hope someone rescues it and that it doesn't go the way of Borders. I miss Borders, I hope that Waterstones isn't going to go down the same road as well.

Why it is wrong to reclassify Autism and AS

2010-02-21T12:56:00.007Z

People often wonder how to classify Asperger's Syndrome. Many people argue that it is part of the Autistic Spectrum. Others argue that it is a distinct condition in its own right. I personally agree with the former argument. However, there a few slight, but still substantial differences between Asperger's Autism, which I have, and Kanner's Autism, which I don't have. That is why I didn't agree with the proposal regarding the next edition of the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) when it is due to be published in May 2013.

Baffled? They are considering listing Asperger's simply as Autism. The present Autistic Spectrum Conditions is the most appropriate and suitable way of describing this condition. Do you think that an Aspie who is capable of going to university with the correct support is the same as an Autistic person who can't talk, rocks, and flaps his/her hands? Do you think that their care needs are the same? Of course they aren't. They ought to get rid of the triad of impairments, in that Aspies and Autistics don't have an imagination, and replace it with problems in interaction, communication, being hypo or hypersensitive to touch, sound and taste, routines and obsessions, difficulties with fine or gross motor skill problems.

That said, I believe there must be much more awareness and provisions for Autism and AS, in schools, colleges, university, employment and society in general, and it must start NOW!

Talking about Asperger's or Autism. I believe that both are a disability, but society makes it more so because the world in its present state is generally hostile to Aspies or anyone who is deemed or perceived to be different... and when society won't make provisions or reasonable adjustments for Aspies... then it will be even more of a disability than what it presently is.

One or two have even claimed that AS and Autism are "fashionable" conditions to claim to have. I can assure you that being hypo or hypersensitive to touch, sound, and taste and not being able to filter these stimuli out, having obsessions and routines, finding it difficult to interact with other people, struggling to read other people's body language, having fine or gross motor skill problems, and being misunderstood and often isolated is not trendy! No-one chooses to be Autistic, and besides... I have had AS all my life, so that hardly constitutes a trend!

I also take the view that if anyone has ever insulted, done wrong to, or taken the mickey out of me, a man with Asperger's, in a nasty way, from the day I started school to now, in the last 20-odd years, it doesn't say anything about me, but it speaks volumes about them, and the conclusion which has to be drawn is that such individuals aren't worth knowing and that we are better off without them.

What is weird today is conventional tomorrow

2010-02-12T21:53:00.010Z

During my life, I have been called both odd and weird many times, on several different occasions. According to the triad of impairments, people with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome are supposed to not have an imagination, according to the triad of impairments. I would argue it is people who call those with Autism and AS weird who don't have an imagination, as they are demonstrating a fear and ignorance of the unknown or different. It is they who are shutting their minds off, not those with Autism/AS.

What or who was weird or odd in opinions or lifestyle choices in February 1990, or February 1970 or February 1950 or February 1910 is conventional today, and similarly, what or who is odd or weird today could turn out to be conventional by February 2030....

It was once believed that the Earth was flat, that the Sun went around the Earth (The Roman Candle Church imprisoned Galileo for saying that). Before Newton discovered gravity people just thought heavy objects fell heavier than others. Homosexuality was a criminal offence in the UK until 1967 and for some years afterwards was viewed as a mental illness. It is now accepted.

In the 1950's and early 1960's free-market economics were viewed as eccentric and extreme. However, they became government policy in the 1980's. It was once widely believed that Autism was caused by ones upbringing. Apartheid looked as it if was here to stay forever in 1970 in South Africa. There's little chance of it returning today. In 1950 there was segregation in the deep south of the USA. No-one would seriously try to bring it back now.

In 1956 Rock n Roll was seen as dangerous and revolutionary... yet within a few years as mainstream and later even old-fashioned. In January 1977 Mick Jones out of the Clash said "We want no Elvis, Beatles or Rolling Stones in 1977". Thirty years ago, the idea of civil partnerships would have caused outrage amongst most people, but now they are accepted.

Be grateful for the NHS - it meant I could blog here quicker otherwise

2010-02-09T17:18:00.003Z

In life, I usually find that procrastination is my worst enemy... when I work at something and set my mind to it, I usually achieve it, whether it is quickly or slowly, but the problem is with me often, getting down to do it... I always get distracted or put it off.

However, from the 29th January, procrastination didn't come into it. That day, I was walking down a flight of steps. Nothing unusual or remarkable about that you might ask. No, nothing at all, apart from the fact that I slipped. I wasn't drunk either. I was as sober as I am now. Being right-handed, I put my right-arm out and my body weight went onto my right-hand. I didn't feel anything at the time, apart from stupid, and I got up and carried on, thinking little about it.

On Friday night though, it started to hurt, and my right-hand went very sore and stiff. Throughout Saturday I found it painful to grip or to hold things, and in fact, I couldn't write and had great difficulty in typing. By Sunday morning my right hand was twice the size of my left-hand. Therefore, I decided to go to hospital.

At the hospital, I was waiting about an hour and I had an x-ray. A pot was put on and I was told that I would learn the results on Friday morning. The consultant told me that I could have broken my Scaphoid bone in my wrist. David Beckham, the former Manchester United and England player, sustained the same injury in 2003. However, I was told that I could have sprained my wrist. I sprained my wrist way back in July 1990, and it was painful then.

During Monday and Tuesday, I was in a considerable amount of pain. I could write but my handwriting was not up to the standard that it usually is. Getting a shower was difficult as well. I washed my hair, then the lower half of my body, without getting the pot wet. Gradually, the pain subsided.

On Friday morning, the consultant informed me that I hadn't broke anything in my right wrist, but instead, have sprained it and sustained severe internal bruising. I was given a splint to wear for a week, but yesterday I decided to stop wearing it. My wrist is almost back to normal now, but is still stiff and sore, particularly if I lay on it in bed. However, it is 70% back to normal.

I would also like to thank the NHS. It has its critics, but all I can say is that it served me fine whenever I have had to use it, and I will continue to use it, whether I become a multi-millionaire or a pauper. Private health care might mean that the user is able to jump queues when seeking treatment, but it is exclusive. It benefits only those who can afford it. For those who can't afford it, tough.....

Seeing as my right arm is now potted up, I might wear a hooded top, run up and down steps, jabbing at thin air, whilst singing the rocky theme tune....I slipped walking down some stairs on Friday... and as I fell, I put my right hand out.. and went on it.... I didn't feel anything at the time, apart from stupid..... However, it began to hurt on Friday evening.... and I began not to be able to move it.... Then... I was out Saturday night and it had swollen... I decided to go to the yesterday morning....

John Terry is no politician or preacher

2010-02-07T13:28:00.006Z

Last week, John Terry, the captain of both Chelsea and England football teams, was in the newspapers for his affair with Vanessa Perroncel, the former girlfriend of Wayne Bridge, the Manchester City defender. Terry is married with twins. Bridge was once a close friend of Terry's, but I presume he isn't now. However, Terry's affair with Vanessa Perroncel only started after she had split with Bridge. Chelsea play at Stamford Bridge, so whilst Terry is popular with one bridge.... he isn't with another... I am sure he will cross that bridge when he comes to it!

My view is that whilst Terry undoubtedly has been a shit off the field, I can't see why or how it affects his ability as both a footballer or as England captain. It is not as if he's a politician, telling everybody he is a kinda straight guy, or telling us all to get back to basics, or posing at a garden gate with a wife and two kids smiling, banging on about family values and attacking homosexuals and single parents, whilst sleeping with his secretary, or researcher (Male/female) or going with prostitutes or having sex with a sheep is it? He hasn't been preaching to us on making cutbacks, attacking people on benefits or benefit fraud, whilst taking money in brown envelopes from Harrods owners for asking questions in Parliament, or claming for non-existent mortgages, or moat repairs.

They dropped him because he apparently is a role model to children. He hasn't beaten up his wife, he hasn't done drugs, he hasn't raped anybody and he hasn't been downloading child pornography, yet given the media coverage, you would think so. It remainds me of how Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand, who again, did wrong and were out of order, were crucified out of proportion for their offence, by the tabloids, in the "Sachsgate" scandal of October 2008. I had a daft thought that the front of the Sun proclaimed "EXCLUSIVE: JOHN TERRY ATE MY CHILDREN"

Talking of politics, I have heard a rumour that Gordon Brown and David Cameron are both writing to John Terry to thank him for becoming the focus of news last week, and for removing their problems and struggles from the media spotlight... I have also heard they have wrote to Capello, suggesting he has an affair so it can carry on!

The logic of the management of the England football team was shown by their decision to drop John Terry because he is no role model to children.... and they pick Rio Ferdinand to take his place.. presumably on the proviso that he is. This is the same Rio Ferdinand who has been done for drunk driving and speeding... Terry couldn't have killed anyone by what he did.. Ferdinand could have... it's a funny old game, as Mr James Greaves would tell us.

Who researches this drivel and why?

2010-02-06T22:28:00.005Z

Looking on the BBC 1 teletext news today, I saw the following item.... "People who own a cat are more likely to have a university degree than people who own a dog"..... I know I am a facts, figures and statistics man myself, and often come out with obscure facts, but I can't see the relevance or significance in this. WHO COMES UP WITH THIS DRIVEL AND WHY DO WE NEED TO KNOW? and this was from a serious news channel.... The only relevance I can see in it is that it was a study into cats and dogs, to see that cats can be left longer at home than dogs...

Old and young people

2010-01-29T11:57:00.001Z

It is often said that young people don't respect old people, and many of them don't, but what about old people who don't respect young people?

Oi, Masses, Try This Opium.....

2010-01-23T21:14:00.001Z

Karl Marx called religion the opium of the masses.... Twenty years ago he would have called TV the religion of the masses.... if he had been around in 2010... he would have called celebrity the opium of the masses....

Which is the greater offence?

2010-01-21T21:41:00.008Z

The media this week has discussed revelations about the late MP, and former Northern Ireland Secretary, Mo Mowlam. The crux of the story is that Mowlam misled the former Prime Minister, Tony Blair, about her brain tumour, which was diagnosed in 1996. Mowlam seemingly told Blair and others that the tumour was benign, when in fact it was malignant.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2010/jan/17/mowlam-tumour-blair-labour

So what if Mowlam did lie? It wouldn't be a first for a politician, and she certainly won't be the last politician to be, euphemistically, "Economical with the truth".

Together, Blair and Mowlam played a blinder in April 1998 in Northern Ireland. They were a briliant double act on that occasion. Could Blair have pulled off that accord alone? Could Mowlam have? We shall never know, but together they made it work better together than apart. Blair's record on the world stage after 9/11 was less illustrious. It is a pity he couldn't have used his undoubted huge charm, to try to have prevented the Iraq war. Unlike her former boss, at least Mowlam didn't mislead Parliament into voting for an illegal, pointless and unwinnable war, which sent thousands of young men to their graves

What Annoys Me

2010-01-17T14:45:00.034Z

If you ever say to me that I am turning into Victor Meldrew, I take it as a compliment. He was a hero of mine. Victor moaned about the things in life that pissed us off, but because we are British, we aren't allowed or supposed to rant or moan about them.

So here are a list of things which in life, annoy me. I am going to let it all hang out....

1) Celebrities under 25 publishing their life stories. Charlotte Church and Wayne Rooney are two who come to mind. I don't dispute that they are both talented, but still..... Celebrites shouldn't be allowed to write their life stories until they are 35 years old.

2) Radio DJ's talking over songs. The show is about music, not them.

3) Religious fanatics. Everybody should have a right to believe in, or follow what religion they wish. Similarly, no-one has a right to try to persuade non-believers or Atheists into going to Church or following religions. What business have they doing that?

4) Bald men wearing ponytails. If you are losing your hair, you are losing hair. Why draw attention to it?

5) Crap music played when you are waiting on the phone.

6) People who walk into you.

7) Queues.

8) Traffic Jams.

9) People who go on about the "Good old days".

10) People who say your teen years or school years are the happiest of your life. We are all different. We all have different ideas, different views and different experiences in life. Some people loved their teen years or schooldays, others were indifferent to them, and some absolutely hated them. So how are they the happiest times of everybody's life?

11) People who believe everything they read in the newspapers. They have their own biases, their own spins on the news, their own distortions and exaggeration. If someone ever said to me "It must be true, I read it in the Sun", I would seriously question their intelligence levels.

12) People who call for all breeds of dogs to be banned when it is idiots who should be banned from owning them. When you get idiots and numpties, bringing dogs up, they will be nasty or vicious. Never mind banning certain breeds of dogs, what about banning certain types of people from owning them?

13) Greed.

14) Inconsistency.

15) People trying to ban books or films they have never seen or read. How can you know? and also, if you don't like it, don't listen or watch. GET A LIFE, or at least, come to an opinion once you have read or seen it.

16) Bandwagon jumpers. The "Sachsgate" incident in October 2008 springs to mind. Yes, what Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand did wasn't funny, it wasn't clever and it wasn't witty. They both deserved to be punished. However, what nauseated me about the business was that originally, two people complained about it. Then, the Wail on Sunday, who hate the BBC, like the Sun does, (Probably because they are an independent station and report the news in an unbiased, factual way), published it, and 30,000 people complained. Most of those people would never have listened to such a show if it wasn't for the Wail alerting them to it. Some of them probably didn't even see or hear what Brand and Ross said. They complained because it was something for them to complain about, and it provided a reason for them to have a go at the BBC.

17) Christmas songs being played in shops in November.

18) People putting their Christmas decorations up in November.

19) Hypocrisy.

20) People who do wrong, get caught, and try to play the victim afterwards. You did what you did. You were caught, you deserve to get punished.

21) Mistakes in books and newspapers. When dates are wrong, names are wrong, facts are wrong or when they frankly don't make any sense. Why don't they check beforehand? I presume they are being paid a lot of money to write what they do, so justify that wage. I seriously wonder how a lot of literature is classified as being suitable by a publisher.

22) The misappropriation of words. Tragic, eccentric and genius are among them. When the Queen Mother died in her sleep on Saturday 30th March, 2002, at the age of 101, at Royal Lodge, one or two newspapers called it a tragic death. Sad for her family and friends undoubtedly, but tragic? I hardly think so. For me, tragic is somebody who dies in their 20's, 30's or 40's, or at least in most cases it is.

Seeing someone with Alzheimer's Disease deteriorate is tragic. Someone being struck down with a terrible illness or dying in an accident, particularly when young, is tragic. Someone having a miserable life in which nothing goes right for them is tragic. What happened in Thailand on Sunday 26th December 2004, with the Tsnuami, was tragic. Dunblane was tragic. 9/11 was tragic. The rape and murder of a child is tragic. Old people dying alone, uncared about, is tragic. The death of a 101-year-old in her sleep, in a palace, after living a life of unimaginable luxury, surrounded by her family, was not tragic. If that is tragedy, lets have more tragedy in the world.

Medals for what?

2010-01-16T12:52:00.007Z

Earlier this week, a man named Roger Day was fined and given community service for appearing at the cenotaph last November, wearing 17 fake war medals. Pinned to his lapel was the Distinguished Service Order and Military Cross - in addition to campaign medals stretching from the Second World War to the first Gulf conflict. He also wore SAS insignia including a beret. In truth, Day's only military service was when he served 18 months with a Junior Leaders Regiment - a former Army preparation scheme for youngsters - in the 1960's.

According to reports, Day's motive was to seduce a woman 24 years his junior. In punishment, Day was fined 60 hours of community service, had his 17 medals confiscated and was told to pay £40 court costs. I don't read them anymore, but they missed their chance for me. A tabloid newspaper should have had a headline screaming, "YOU A WAR HERO: THAT'LL BE THE DAY!".

Seriously, Day deserved to be punished because what he did was an insult to men who genuinely have obtained their medals in wars, but why doesn't anyone prosecute Prince Charles and Prince Philip when they shamelessly appear at the Cenotaph year in year out, wearing their array of medals? It certainly makes me wonder what they did to earn them!

Learning BY past experiences

2010-01-11T00:07:00.007Z

In life, a lot of people get it into their heads that they are bad or inferior at a subject or skill. Be it Maths, or English or whatever. It is a three-way street. It depends on how YOU learn it, how motivated YOU are and on how OTHERS teach the subject.

However, the school system, in the UK at least, offers a bundled-up, one size fits all, approach which tries to teach all pupils the same way, and it assumes all pupils think the same and are the same.... but they are all different. That applies to even NT's. We are people. We are not clones or Sheep. A lot also depends on how talented the teacher is.

The belief, that one is useless at a subject, however, can stick with a person for the rest of their life, due to early experiences in their life.

The past - present and future

2010-01-10T13:49:00.002Z

Yesterday is dead and gone, and tomorrow is out of sight... on that basis, I live very much in the present.....

Daft thought when watching celebrity mastermind

2010-01-08T09:30:00.009Z

Whilst watching Celebrity Mastermind last night I had a daft thought. One of the guests was former Home Secretary and Conservative leader Michael Howard, who is standing down at the next General Election. It would have been funny if John Humphreys, the presenter, had asked, "Who was it, who asked you the same question 14 times and yet you didn't answer once?" and to that, Howard had replied "Pass".

Baffled??? Watch this link below, particularly from 4 minutes onwards, and you might understand the daft thought....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uwlsd8RAoqI

I signed a document on Monday and wrote 2009, and I wrote it on something else today, even though we have been in 2010 almost a week. Every new year, during the first few days, I always seem to write the year of the one that has just passed!

Generosity with some drugs - Stinginess with others

2010-01-07T22:13:00.005Z

I have noticed that it is very easy to obtain anti-depressants from your local GP, if you want them. I have never done this, being generally a very honest person, but I would imagine that if I walked into a GP's room, saying that I was feeling low, unmotivated, couldn't be bothered to get out of bed on a morning or to get washed or to shave, or to eat, I would readily be offered, or even given, a prescription for anti-depressants.

Yet, if I went to the same GP complaining of concentration span problems, or attention difficulties, and asked for Adderall, or Ritalin, to try out, I would be refused. I wonder why. I am puzzled why they give anti-depressants out so easily and readily, yet refuse drugs such as Adderall or Ritalin, or are extremely reluctant to prescribe them to someone.

Concentration span problems, or Attention difficulties can be just as devastating as depression. Both can hinder the sufferers life, yet it doesn't appear that way in the medical professions eyes. Are they afraid that someone with attention span problems would take an overdose? If someone is severely depressed, they are more likely, I would have thought, to take an overdose of the tablets that they are being so readily prescribed.

The Snow freezes Britain to a halt - but did it years ago as well?

2010-01-06T19:53:00.013Z

Just like they said the summer of 2009 would be a "Barbecue Summer", when it turned out to be an average summer, a few months ago, the Met Office said that the winter of 2009/10 would be mild and wet. In fairness to them, they did forecast the present Arctic conditions, and it is too early to deliver a post-mortem on this winter, as it doesn't end until the 20th March, but in future, I think they should stick to short-term forecasts, and avoid making forecasts months in advance, unless they are setting themselves up as a Nostradamus in reverse. We have had two heavy snowfalls already, and it is only the
6th January.

Almost a foot of snow fell on the 20th December 2009, which didn't fully clear, when the second lot fell on the 5th January 2010. It started snowing yesterday at about 6am, and didn't stop fully until 6.30pm. There were further flurries, which didn't finish until 8.20pm. There was a snow shower at about 12.30pm today, and it has snowed this evening from 7pm. About nine or ten inches have fell in the last two days. Many motorists had to abandon their cars yesterday and most bus and rail services were cancelled.

I'm not saying things were better when I was younger. They weren't. I also don't think that anyone should risk their lives in going to school or getting to work. When the weather is as severe as it is at the moment, children should be kept off, but I can remember, on several occasions, in the Junior and Secondary school, going in at least a foot of snow, and thinking no more of it. In the final year of myself being at Junior School (On Monday 12th January 1987), we had an exceptionally heavy snowfall. On that occasion, the school boiler was working. However, my mum kept me off, but about half of the year went. The following Monday, my mum wrote a letter on my behalf saying that she had kept me off, and why. This was in anticipation of myself having to explain where I had been. Her anticipation was correct, as I was asked.

The only other occasions I can recall being off school because of snow was from Monday 10th February 1986, when I was nine-and-a-half, for a week, and from Wednesday 6th February 1991, when I was 14-and-a-half, for three days. Both times, we weren't sent home because of snow, but because of the school boiler breaking. On the latter occasion, we were instructed to return the following Monday, by which time the "Boiler will be fixed". Most of us did return, including myself. However, the snow still hadn't fully cleared, and didn't do so until the end of the week.

I recall going at school on odd occasions when it snowed in the Infants, though I can't remember the dates. I definitely remember going to school and coming home in early 1985 when it snowed, in January and February 1986, when it snowed, I think in March 1987, on Friday 22nd January 1988, March 1988, November 1988, late February/early March 1990, December 1990. Doubtless, there are other occasions, which have slipped my memory due to the passage of time.

Times certainly have changed. They get a dusting of snow nowadays, and pupils are sent home until it has totally thawed. I wonder why that is? Britain was also hit by three severe winters, between the 22nd January 1947 and 16th March 1947, between the 22nd December 1962 and 5th March 1963 and between 28th December 1978 and late March 1979. I wonder how people coped, and fared in those days? Were schoolchildren sent home? Were bus and rail services cancelled? Did people not get to work? They seem to manage ok with persistent deep snow cover in Russia, Greenland, Iceland and Siberia. It makes you wonder....

As a final footnote, perhaps a career in politics might be appropriate for those who work at the met office, with barbecue summers and mild winters, as they would be suited for a job where they say one thing, and mean another.

Scales on the Autistic Spectrum and beyond.....

2010-01-03T17:11:00.011Z

It is commonly said that Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Alan Turing and Glenn Gould had AS. Fictional characters I have seen Asperger traits include Roy Cropper (A character from Coronation Street), Leonard, the oldest paperboy in Bolton portrayed by Peter Kay in that Peter Kay thing in January 2000, a character from the 1990 Christmas special of "One Foot in the grave" and the Lisbeth Salander character in Stieg Larsson's "The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo".

I have devised a theory regarding the Autistic Spectrum and beyond. Those who are on the severe or extreme end of the AS scale are verging towards HFA. I don't believe that there is any such thing as having "mild" AS or "mild" Autism, just varying degrees. I do believe though, that there is varying degrees of NT-ness in NT's. Those in the middle are average, conventional, NT's, whereas on one end of the NT scale you get people verging towards AS.

Along with people from Einstein to Gould allegedly having full-blown AS, and the fictional characters listed above, other famous people I remember, or have read about over the years, who I can see AS traits in, are the late twins Norris and Ross McWhirter, who founded and edited the Guinness Book of Records, Patrick Moore, the sky at night presenter, the late Brian Clough, with his repetitiveness, calling everyone "Young man" and wearing the same green jumper almost everywhere he went, and his outspokenness, the late MP's Robin Cook, Donald Dewar and Enoch Powell, the late Prime Minister Sir Edward Heath, and Bill Gates, the IBM founder. As a coincidence, most of the late individuals mentioned above died in the noughties, four of them within sixteen months of each other (McWhirter, Clough, Heath and Cook).

However, I don't think any of them had AS. They had symptoms, and were, or are, at one end of the NT scale, but not enough to be fully diagnosed. Therefore, they are still NT's, though with Cloughie, you could argue he was also on the other end of the NT scale. He was definitely a mass of contradictions. At the other end of scale? Puzzled? Well, in my evaluation, those at the other end of the NT scale are heading towards Narcissism, as I believe there are extreme NT's. Indeed, some NT's are certainly self-obsessed. They are extremely fanatical about themselves and their image so much that they are almost narcissistic.

Both Aspies and extreme NT's can, and narcissists are, obsessed with their own lives and their own worlds, but for entirely different reasons.....

A new year, a new decade

2010-01-01T14:16:00.018Z

A new year, a new decade. What I have found striking, as we have entered the 'tens, has been the lack of programmes on TV looking back at the naughties. On new year's night 1989, I stopped at my Grandmother's house (She is still alive, albeit very frail. Even so, she will celebrate her 93rd birthday on the 25th August 2010). There was a programme on TV called "Cilla says goodbye to the '80's".

When the 1990's and the 20th Century ended, there were a triple-decker of programmes looking back at the year 1999, the 1990's and the 20th Century. Yet at the end of 2009, all there has been are programmes looking back at the year, which has seen the deaths of famous names such as David Vine, Tony Hart, Wendy Richard, Jade Goody, Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Sir Bobby Robson, Patrick Swayze, Keith Floyd, Edward Kennedy, Stephen Gateley and Edward Woodward. Otherwise, it is as if the naughties never happened.

We are now in the age of image, soundbite, spin and reality TV, even though Big Brother is about to end this year, and this is probably why no serious, in-depth, analytical, "Look-back at the decade" programmes have been made or why they aren't made anymore. Even on the "Look back at 2009" programmes, there has been no serious, in-depth analysis made by a presenter, but instead, a host of mildly famous people acting as talking heads, rather like the best or worst compilation programmes in 2000. I also think that the noughties has been the decade of dumbing down.

The recession has got worse, caused by the bankers irresponsibility. MP's and the political profession have been disgraced and discredited in 2009, with their false expense claims, such as claiming money to pay off non-existent mortgages and for repairs for duck ponds and moats. On this theme, there will be a General Election this year. I predict that it will be held on the 6th May and David Cameron's Conservative party will return to power after an absence of 13 years, with a majority of about 50 seats.

Weatherwise, it was a mixed year. It was quite a cold winter, with a cold January and heavy snow at the beginning of February but a mild end. March, April and May were sunny. June was mixed but there was a heatwave at the end of the month, which transferred into July. However, the month was then very wet and unsettled. August was mixed, but fairly warm and dry. September was very dry, and October was quite dry. November was very wet and December cool and sunny.

It was a neutral kind of year for me personally. Neither good or bad. My mum's family had a bad year. On Thursday 26th March, her younger sister suffered an aneurysm in her brain and had to undergo a 10-hour operation at Sheffield Royal Hallamshire hospital, she survived though. Then, on Saturday 11th April, my mum's brother-in-law died suddenly in his sleep, of a heart attack, at the age of 69. He would have been 70 in October, and would have celebrated his Golden Wedding Anniversary on Boxing Day.

The decade was also a mixed one. I didn't become wealthy, I haven't achieved as much as I would like, I still have serious problems related to having AS, I am single. I have no children. I am unemployed, but it was still one of progress for me on the whole, and certainly better than the '80's or the '90's for me.

On Wednesday 31st May 2000, (I have never married), came the second most important day of my life, when I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. All sorts of feelings, which I have bottled up beforehand, came out after the diagnosis. This propelled me to design my website. Through this website, I made a few friends, namely people who have Asperger's Syndrome, have had my guestbook signed by people across the world, which I didn't envisage, from England, Northern Ireland, Scotland, Wales, the USA, Canada, Australia, New Zealand, Isreal, France, Singapore and Malta. I have had emails from people all over the world as well.

Almost every email I have had has been positive. I am not an unfeeling person, but due to my past experiences, facing a world that is hostile to Aspies and Autistic people, I have developed a thick skin. I have had to, in order to survive. Besides, everybody is entitled to have or to express an opinion, whether they agree with you or not. It would be a boring world if everybody thought the same, and if somebody else writes another hostile email, saying that they dislike my website, I won't be devastated or suicidal as a result. What would anger me, is someone making personal attacks on myself, but that wouldn't crush me either. I would shrug it off and think that they have the problem, not me.

The advent of Facebook, the fact that my website needs a lot of updating, other websites and increased knowledge about Asperger's Syndrome in the last 14 months have all reduced the popularity of my website. I think the peak days of my website have passed. Nobody has signed my guestbook since the 4th October 2009, and I haven't received an email about my website since the 5th December 2009... which read....

"Greetings from Calgary, Alberta, Canada!

My husband has Asperger's Syndrome. My son likely has it too. He is 6. Such is my adventure. I have enjoyed reading your website. Thank you for all the time you have taken to put the site together.

Best Regards".

This decade, I also visited Cambridge, London and Norwich for the first time, and went abroad for the first time. I watched a DVD for the first ever time, and got a PC for the first ever time with Internet access. I used ebay for the first time and bought something off it. I stopped using walkman's (November 2004) for MP3 players. However, I stopped keeping weather records in January 2004.

As well as reality TV and dumbing down, this has been the decade of Friends Reunited, music downloads, facebook, blogs, twitter, youtube, wikipedia, myspace, broadband, Blue ray players, wars, sophisticated terrorist techniques, x-box, wii fit, texting and digital TV. Top of the Pops and Grandstand were axed. The use of DNA has advanced in crime, with people being convicted for murders, 20 or 30 years after they did the offence. Major high street stores stopped selling VHS recorders. The influence of newspapers dramatically decreased, due to people setting up their own websites, writing their blogs with their take on the news and events and expressing their opinions.

No doubt advances in medicine, science and technology, and changes in life will occur in the next ten years. I also believe, or at least hope, awareness will increase in the field of Autism and Asperger's Syndrome.

Times Have Changed But......

2009-12-14T17:50:00.002Z

In three weeks time, we will be in 2010. A new year, and a new decade. This means that the year 1990 is 20 years ago.

Earlier this year, on my blog, I wrote that "To me, it seems that 1990 in some ways was so recent, and yet in others, it seems so long ago and so distant". I also opined, "However, for me, the past is over-rated. I wouldn't want to go back and live in 1990 again. I am much happier in the present day, for all its faults".

I stand by both statements. I wouldn't, for one moment, want to go back to Monday 1st January 1990. However, I have noticed that for all the societal and technological changes and advances, many aspects of human behaviour haven't changed. There is still greed, as seen by the bankers threatening to move abroad if their bonuses are taxed. There is still unfairness, where people who work hard and aren't paid or rewarded nowhere near enough for it, and yet others who are paid colossal amounts of money for doing comparatively little amounts of work. There is still bullying in schools and elsewhere and there are still rapists and paedophiles.

There are also still scapegoats. In the 1930's, it was Jews who were scapegoated for the ills of Germany. In truth, it was the great depression and the Treaty of Versailles which crippled Germany. In the 1950's and 1960's, coloured people and immigrants were scapegoated in the UK, with signs put up at boarding houses saying "No Irish, no blacks and no dogs". In the 1970's and 1980's, homosexuals were scapegoated and faced bigotry.

In the early 1990's, via the media and some politicians, single parents were demonised. In the late 1990's, as there was a booming economy, the unemployed were targeted, and the last few years have been the turn of Asylum Seekers to receive this treatment. I don't agree with mass immigration. It has to be curbed and halted. It is the fault of the two main parties who have been in power the last 30 years that this issue hasn't been dealt with, and hitherto, voters have turned to parties such as the BNP. However, it isn't solely mass immigration which is the cause of all of the UK's present problems.

Who really is tight?

2009-12-13T00:15:00.004Z

Jews are supposed to be tight (Apology to any Jews on my contact list. I am not anti-semitic in any way, shape or form). Scotsmen are supposed to be tight and Yorkshiremen are supposed to be tight. Often Scottish or Yorkshire people themselves use this justification for being stingy. I find all three suppositions to be bullshit. How would a Scottish Jew living in Yorkshire fare if they were to be true? Would they fit ear trumpets to the side of their house so they can hear a penny being dropped in the street?

Songs of Praise

2009-12-09T08:34:00.006Z

It is my parents 37th wedding anniversary today. They married on a cold and dull, but dry day at St Helen's Church, Laithes Lane, Athersley, on Saturday, 9th December, 1972. They have known each other since September 1959, have been together since 1964 and were engaged in 1967. They only chose December to get married because my dad had been working in Coventry as a welder, and earned a lot of money. My dad proposed in October, on my mum's birthday. So that year, my dad was sent to Coventry! They didn't have their honeymoon in Cyprus, or Lanzarote or Greece. No, they had a few days in York, which, by coincidence, is one of my favourite places in the UK.

Talking of churches, when Songs of Praise turn up and the TV cameras are there, have you ever noticed how churches are always full, and everybody is singing with full gusto? Yet, the following week, when the cameras aren't there, the same church will probably have 3 old people and a dog in it. The churches never seem that full on an average Sunday. I am convinced that even the Atheists turn up when the cameras are there, just to get on TV. If I ever go to church, it is for a wedding, or a funeral. I don't sing hymns though. It would be hypocritical if I did.

Ice Cream Sales in December

2009-12-07T09:22:00.003Z

Two ice cream vans went up my street last week, the first week in December, when it was both cold and unsettled. I know people have to earn a living, but doesn't it seem a bit of a waste of time, effort and petrol in early December, to be selling ice cream?

Gambling

2009-12-06T17:37:00.007Z

I had some good luck yesterday. I had had a bet on the football. I decided to put £4 on. When I checked the results yesterday at 5pm on TV, I half-expected to not win anything, thinking to myself, "I'll be probably let down by a couple of teams". I was wrong. Arsenal, Aston Villa, Man Utd, Cardiff, Newcastle, Charlton, Norwich and Bournemouth all won, netting me £106.87. I was going to put Liverpool down to win away at Blackburn, but they drew 0-0.

I'm not a major gambler. I sometimes have a bet on the football coupons, and bet every weekend on the UK and Euro lottery, as well as the annual Grand National horse race at Aintree. Gambling for me, is all random. Any team can have a off day, or fluke or freak goals can occur. A favourite in the National or Derby could slip or fall at a fence. I think properly, you either have the gambling instinct or you don't.

From the age of 10, I used to pick out a horse for the Grand National and up to when I was legally old enough, my dad would put the bet on for me. I picked Mr Frisk out to win in 1990. I won £17, as it was 16-1.The next winner I had, and the first I put on myself, was Rough Quest on Easter Saturday 1996, the 7-1 favourite, winning £16. The year after, my mum's horse won and mine came second. In 1998, I picked out Earth Summit, and won £16, as I put £2 on. Three years later, in 2001, there had been the Foot and Mouth crisis earlier that year. However, I was laughing as a 33-1 horse I picked out won. I got £68 as I put £2 on Red Maurader! My final win so far was last year with Comply or Die, the favourite.

Other winnings I have had include £80 on the final night of 1997 in a bingo, £89 on the UK lottery with 4 numbers, in 1999, tenners on the UK lottery on occasion, £6.50 on the Euro lottery, and about five years ago when I won £50 on the Irish Lottery. I just hope to win the UK or Euro lottery, or Irish!

I am not a great socialiser. In fact, I am rather a poor mixer, and I have never particularly liked night clubs. I don't go to them, but between 1997 and March 2006 I used to go to a pub quiz on Monday nights, and won on a game called open the box, £40, £70, and on 1st December 2003, £230, but that was just luck, rather than skill in the latter two, but with the £40 one, it was a question, and I got it. The question was "When was the battle of Bannockburn?". I got it right, by answering, "1314".

Dog Attacks, Laws and the Media

2009-12-03T21:55:00.004Z

On Monday, a 4-year-old boy was killed by a pit-bull type dog that is apparently banned in the UK, and inevitably, the story of the tragedy featured heavily in the UK news.

Dogs are like children, because often, when you get idiots and numpties, bringing them up, particularly breeds such as Rottweilers and Akitas, it is a recipe for disaster. That is not a slur on Rottweilers and Akitas. No breed, even Labradors, should be left on alone with a baby or youngster. A car, alone is neither good or bad. It is just a piece of metal, but when you get nutcases, or people who can't drive controlling them, they become dangerous weapons.

When tragedies like this occur, moral panics arise, particularly whipped up by newspapers such as the Daily Mail and the Sun. There are simply some people who aren't fit to bring up either animals or children. By all means, if a dog attacks someone without provocation or reason, destroy it, but punish the deed, not the breed. An individuals background should be looked at before they are allowed to buy a dog. Never mind banning certain breeds of dogs, what about banning certain types of people from owning them?

Who lacks empathy?

2009-11-30T10:57:00.003Z

They say that us Aspies and Autistics lack empathy, yet some of the least empathetic and most self-centred people I have ever met have been NT's. This theory is as credible as the refridgerator mothers causing Autism, AS and Autism only occurs in middle and upper-class families, and those with Autism and AS have no imagination beliefs. It is time all four beliefs were disowned, and expunged from the medical books and any future literature on the subject.

Gary McKinnon's extradition

2009-11-29T22:30:00.017Z

Last Thursday, 26th November, it was announced that the Home Secretary Alan Johnson has rejected a last ditch appeal by Gary McKinnon, the computer hacker who, like myself, has Asperger's Syndrome against extradition to the USA, where he will eventually face trial for his allegedly hacking into 97 USA military and Nasa computers, causing around £425,000 of damage. If found guilty, McKinnon could face up to 60 years in prison. He is now 43 years of age, being born on Thursday 10th February 1966. If he serves a full sentence, he could be 103 years old when released, so he almost certainly will never be released if he does.

I found Johnson's decision to be disgusting. As I wrote on my blog earlier this year, McKinnon was in the UK when he allegedly committed the crime. Therefore, if found guilty, he should serve time in the UK. This would also apply if McKinnon had been an NT hacker. If McKinnon committed the crime whilst in Canada, after being found guilty, he should serve time in a Canadian jail. If he had committed the crime in Australia, then he should serve time in an Australian jail. If he was in the USA, then he should serve time in the USA, but he wasn't.

David Cameron can see that McKinnon's extradition is unfair. Boris Johnson, the London Mayor and home secretary's namesake, can see that it is unfair, David Davis, the Tory backbench MP, can see that it is unfair, Nick Clegg, the Liberal Democrat leader, can see that it is unfair, Chris Huhne, the Liberal Democrat MP, can see that it is unfair, the Daily Wail, Express and Daily Mirror can see that McKinnon's extradition is unfair, eighty-four Labour MP's can see that it is unfair. Andrew MacKinlay, the Labour MP for Thurrock, resigned partly in protest over McKinnon's extradition, so why can't Alan Johnson do the decent thing and halt it?

McKinnon's mother will have to relocate now to the USA, if she wants to see him again, should he be found guilty. Personally, if I was a judge, I would give McKinnon a ten-year suspended sentence, on the premise that if he does this again, he will be taken to the USA and made to serve 60 years in a normal jail, whilst at the same time, taking his condition should be taken into account.

I wonder if Johnson would have extradited McKinnon, had he hacked into German cyberspace, or Russian cyberspace, or Argentine cyperspace? When did the USA extradite the so-called Irish Americans in New York and Boston, who were funding the IRA? The UK government seems reluctant extradite genuine criminals or terrorists, but is happy to extradite an Autistic man who has neither bombed, shot, burned or injured anyone.

McKinnon has done the USA a favour, in a way, because he has exposed the comparatively easy access of their cyberspace, which they previously thought was impregnable. It obviously wasn't. Now, as a result, the USA can make it genuinely impregnable, and prevent any would-be terrorist or Al-Qaeda activist hacker from causing genuine damage, certainly damage which would be far more severe than what McKinnon caused.

If McKinnon is to be tried in the USA for what he allegedly did, then shouldn't those who maintained the security of the US cyberspace be also on trial, for negligence, as they made it possible for an Autistic computer hacker to be able to gain access?

What I Would Keep And Change About Having AS

2009-11-24T21:34:00.007Z

Unless some magic cure or pill is introduced to alter one's brain structure, and without it precipitating any ill-effects or brain damage, if one is born with Autism or AS, then one will remain Autistic or Asperger. Yes, early diagnosis is essential. Yes, intervention is essential. Yes, support and understanding is essential. Yes, the general public at large need to be educated much more about the two conditions, but nothing at the moment can or will "cure" Autism or Asperger's Syndrome.

Would I want to be cured? Yes and no. There are certain things about having Asperger's Syndrome that I like and there are some aspects of it which I dislike. Frankly, there are one or two attributes which make me hate having AS.

What I would be delighted to lose is be the hypersensitivity to sound, touch and smell. I wish I could filter sensory stimuli out like NT's can. I can't wear wool and I dislike labels on the back of clothes rubbing against my skin. I hate bus engines, pneumatic drills, burglar alarms and car alarms and chatter. The smell of egg literally makes me feel sick, yet such stimuli hardly seem to bother NT's.

I would like to lose the monotropic thinking which comes with AS. I wouldn't miss that at all. I would love to be able to nonchalantly drive a manual car and have a flowing conversation, like NT's effortlessly can. I wish I could write a passage on my website and chat to someone freely whilst doing it. I don't like the mental overload problems, which occur when too much is happening at once, or when there is too much stimuli for my senses to process.

I hate not being able to follow instructions from NT's, or sequencing problems. I would say good riddance to the fine and gross motor problems. I wish I could dance and be a brilliant mover on the dance floor. I wish I could bowl overarm, or throw better than I can. I wish I could dive gracefully if I go swimming. Commonly, it is stated that individuals with Asperger's Syndrome have poor handwriting because of this, but for some reason, it hasn't affected me in that respect. Another area where my co-ordination is unaffected is catching a ball or item. I don't have an unusual gait when walking, as is often stated.

Finally, it would be great to be able to see the back of problems with processing information and with interaction and communication.

Which parts of having AS would I wish to keep? The logical, rational thinking, seeing issues in the objective manner in which I see them, the self of individuality, the special interests and my apparently good memory. I would dislike to lose all those aspects of having AS. It is very rare that I get bored, due to those the special interests, the Internet and my website.

I believe, whether I am here to see it or not, that some time in this century, medical science will discover what causes conditions such as Autism and AS.

Another aspect of having Asperger's I have felt, all my life, before AND after I was diagnosed, is the self of being alone. I always have and I believe I always will. I rarely bother with family bashes anymore, because I don't like the noise. There are too many people around at once.

They have children, careers and mortgages. I don't have any of those things. I am not criticising them. I probably would be doing the same now if I was an NT. If I didn't have AS, whilst one can never know for certain, I think it is fair to say I would have a decent job, be married, have children and a mortgage now.

It is just that we are not on the same wavelength and our life experiences have totally diverged. Even if I was to get married, have an ecstatic home life, and have, say four children, which I doubt will happen, I will still feel alone. Whether any offspring of mine would have Autism, AS or be NT, I would feel alone. If I got a job I loved, I would feel alone. I feel alone even if in good company, with everyone getting on famously, and if there are 10 people there. People may be baffled to understand why I feel alone, or how I feel alone, but I do, every moment of my waking day, whether I am alone or not. You can't help who you are, who your parents are, when you are born, where you are born, what you are and how you feel.

Whoever said that being Autistic was like being trapped behind a glass wall was correct. I also feel that it is the same having Asperger's Syndrome, no matter how it affects you.

Extend CRB checks

2009-11-23T23:47:00.002Z

People go on about a nanny state, thenn at the same time, they support ID cards! They can't have it both ways. At the moment, you have to have CRB checks when you work with children. I think this procedure ought to be extended for men who work with women, if they have convictions for rape or sexual offences, because there is always the chance that they could do it again. They should also be made available for people if they buy dogs and cats, to see if they have had convictions in the past for animal cruelty.

Concentration Span

2009-11-16T23:06:00.009Z

When I am interested in something, my concentration span is quite good to exceptionally good, and I take in, and retain information a great deal better than when I am not interested in a subject, or partially interested in it. When that is the case, I have to work hard to retain information, and master the subject.

In life, my concentration span is generally quite poor, and it is true that I am quite easily distracted. My brain is not as efficient as the NT brain at filtering outside noises. That is a cause and factor. I accept that. I am an Aspie, after all. What do you expect?

However, I am seriously considering seeing my GP to see if a tablet can be given to stop my mind switching streams when I am doing something that requires concentration, or to be given downers, as you will learn below! I accept nothing can be done about myself being hypersensitive to touch, sound and smell though.

Another pecularity of my concentration is span is that when I feel low or depressed, it improves. I ought to feel low or depressed more often! When I am in a good mood I find it hard to concentrate on more than one thing at a time. When I am in a average mood, I can, but I have to struggle, but when I feel low, I have brilliant powers of concentration.

I am neither a euphoric or a extremely depressive sort of person by nature. I am rarely euphoric or ecstatic when anything goes right, nor am I suicidal when things go wrong. I reckon if I won 45 million on the lottery, whilst delighted, I would keep my emotions and feelings in control and in check. I never get carried away or totally suppressed in life. Nor do I lose sight of reality. Some people are like that. Others aren't.

Another problem of mine is that I can get impatient when I don't do things as well as I want to, though I have a lot of patience in other ways, and am not generally a volatile person. I can be hard on other people and very critical, but I can also be critical and very, very hard on myself if I get things wrong or if things don't progress as well or as quick as I would like. I also find, that life is so rushed nowadays, certainly more than when I was young, and you get the impression that time is everything, and if you don't speed up, you fail.

Never Mind Friday The 13th - Avoid Friday The 20th

2009-11-15T11:17:00.003Z

Some people on Facebook have jokingly posted that they were going to stop in all day last Friday, the 13th November. I didn't as it happened, but I might do the same next Friday, the 20th, because it is in Children In Need Day. I have three favourite charities, as listed on my blog and am not a scrooge. Indeed, on my birthday in August 1985, a few weeks after the Live Aid concert, which I can vaguely remember, me and a couple of friends on the street had a stall across my garden gate to raise money for the Ethopian crisis. In our naive way of thinking at the time, we would raise money. I can't remember what we sold, but we raised about £8. The following day, me and my mum took the proceeds into the Oxfam shop, which used to exist where I live. It closed about 2001.

I am sure Children In Need is a good cause, but what I dislike is how "In yer face" the whole thing is, and how it is foisted on you.

Greed And Lottery Wins

2009-11-13T00:07:00.003Z

It has been in the UK news about that couple from South Wales who won £45 and a half million pounds on the Euro-lottery this week. All I can say is good luck to them. It would have been better if I had won 45 million pounds, but I wish them a good life, and hope that they enjoy the fruits of their success.

If I were to win that amount of money, apart from being delighted, I wouldn't go public. I would keep £20 million to myself and spread £15 million amongst family and friends. Winning the lottery would change my life, of course it would. How could my life be the same if I had even £10 million?, but I can only drive so many cars. I can only live in so many mansions with swimming pools and tennis courts and I can only go around the world once. Why would I want more cars than I can drive or have houses across the globe that I never even live in? I just can't see the point or reason in having more money than one can spend.

Therefore, I would give £10 million to charities. Autism charities would receive £5 million pounds. Animal welfare charities would benefit by two and a half million, and brain and spinal injuries charities would receive the same amount of money.

False Humour

2009-11-10T22:35:00.003Z

In life, what I find false, and I am sure you have come across such a situation yourself, whether you are NT, Aspie, Autistic, GLDer, SLDer or whatever, is in a pub or working men's club or other similar kind of place, when six to ten people are sat around a table, and someone present comes out with the worst, or most unfunny or the corniest joke you have ever heard, or ever are likely to hear in your entire life, and those present falls about laughing in a sycophant fashion, just because they like that person. Then the joke-teller repeats it and everyone present falls about laughing again, often laughing in a contrived manner.

Another, similarly false situation is someone when could come out with the funniest, most hilarious or most original joke you have ever heard or likely to hear, and because those present may dislike or not be keen on the individual that has told it, there is little or no reaction.

If I was in such a situation, I would laugh at the funny joke and remained straight-faced at the unfunny, corny one, regardless of who had told it and where. It is also the same when a well-known comedian is on stage and he asks the audience a question that he knows very well will evoke a positive response or says something like "We've all done it haven't we?" and they all inevitably cheer "Yes". That is understandable. They have paid money to see and hear him; so therefore, they are going to agree with his viewpoints and humour.

Christmas Gets Earlier Every Year

2009-11-09T01:03:00.002Z

This year, on November 2nd, I saw a Christmas tree in a shop as part of decorations. Then two days later, on November 4th, I saw the first Christmas advert on TV. In 2040 there will probably be Christmas trees up in shops, and adverts on TV, in the middle of September. Don't get me wrong - I don't dislike Christmas, but when the hype starts so early, I am fed up of it by the time the big day arrives. Christmas adverts on TV or elsewhere, and decorations, in town or city centres, should be banned until December 1st!

Differences In Time And TV's

2009-11-08T00:05:00.005Z

I have noticed a difference between two televisions which I have. One is in the kitchen and the other in the living room. When the same programme is on, I hear the same word spoken by the same person about three seconds apart. At first, I thought that the difference was caused due to the system of the kitchen TV being analogue and the living room TV being digital. However, before I got the digital in 2008, both were analogue, and this still happened. Who knows what causes the difference?

Differences In Addressing People

2009-11-07T08:34:00.011Z

An idiosyncracy of mine is that I have always called my aunties and uncles by their first name. I have NEVER used the prefix Aunt or Uncle when talking to them. When addressing my parents, I use mam and dad. I answer to both Kevin or Kev with people who know me. I don't mind being called either.

At Secondary School, most teachers called the male pupils by their christian or first name name. The addressing of pupils by their first name had mainly died out by the time I got there, but one or two old fashioned teachers still addressed us by our surname. Those who did, both taught Mathematics. As I have wrote on my website, there would be no place now for those two.

At my cousin's Prom in 2007, the pupils who were leaving were addressing teachers by their first name, like "Dave", "Andy", "Rob" and "Chris", as if they were the pupils mates. My aunt said it was very much a "We are all mates now" type of atmosphere. I wonder if they are allowed to do that nowadays in Secondary Schools generally or if that rule just applied because the pupils were leaving? We never did that because we weren't allowed, but also, we didn't know what most of the teachers first names were. Besides, I wouldn't have liked it if we could have called them by their first names anyway. It would have seemed so false. I think pupils addressing teachers Sir or Miss, and in return, teachers addressing pupils by their first name is appropriate and balanced.

Teachers are not there to be pupils friends or enemies. They are there primarily to do their jobs, though nowadays, they have other functions, such as being a psychologist and counsellor.

Both a good and bad memory helps

2009-11-06T00:15:00.001Z

In life it is essential to have both a good memory and a bad memory. A good memory helps with people's birthdays, appointments, when people owe you money. It can also help with exams, though knowledge and understanding is also important. Then, a bad memory helps when you owe people money, when embarrassing situations are discussed involving you, or when you hear about, or see someone you dislike from the past!

1990 - So near and yet so far

2009-11-05T02:35:00.027Z

In two months time it will be January 2010 and a new decade, which means that the year 1990 will be 20 years ago. It is the first year ending in a zero that I can properly remember. I can't remember hardly anything happened in 1980, and I wasn't here in 1970. Nor had I even been thought of.

To me, it seems that 1990 in some ways was recent, as there were computers, computer games rap music and CD's around. Soccer teams played with sponsors on their shirts and a lot of music was similar to today. And yet, in many other ways, 1990 seems so long ago and so distant.

My parents went out on the final night of 1989. That night, I slept at my Grandmothers house. She was then an active, vigorous and energetic 72-year-old. I remember that she went to bed at about 10.30pm, and I stayed up, watching TV until just after midnight, then I went to bed. I watched Cilla Black's Goodbye to the '80's, on ITV, made by the now defunct London Weekend Television.

The year before, my mum started legal action for a neck injury she suffered when working as a cleaner for Tesco supermarkets. Her accident occurred on Tuesday 28th March 1989. My mum was given Legal Aid, (I'm from a solidly working-class family. It is bollocks that you have to be mMiddle and upper-class to have Asperger's Syndrome or Autistic. That is about as credible as saying that one's upbringing makes one Autistic, or that the Earth is flat or the Earth revolves around the Sun. If you have to be middle or upper-class to be Autistic or have AS, then I obviously need more money!).

Tesco fought all the way. Then, suddenly, at the end of September 1990, around the 26th, the week before the case was due to go to court. They capitulated, and settled, paying my mum compensation and her legal fees. Why did they capitulate if they had a good case? Two weeks later, my mum had a big bingo win. It was also her birthday, so 1990 was quite a good year for my her.

On Thursday 25th January, there was a terrible storm. Forty-seven people were killed, and two slates blew off our roof. I was in the bath when it happened, at about 5.30pm. I saw the film "Rainman", for the first ever time, on video, on the snowy night of Wednesday 28th February, and I failed to make any connection with Babitt and myself. I was suspended from Secondary School on Thursday 5th April, threatened with explusion, and put on report for a week when I returned, as was the person I fought with. Two days later I got my dad to put some money on a Horse for me, Mr Frisk, which won.

On Saturday 2nd June, I went on a bicycle ride with a friend. We went through a cemetery and saw a grave of his late relation, who died on Friday 25th February 1966, at the age of 66. Then, 11 days later, On Wednesday 13th June, though I loathed my time at Secondary School, I was awarded a "Merit Slip" for my contribution to a Geography lesson, and everybody in the class applauded me when I had finished talking about the Suez crisis of 1956, in Egypt.

My late Grandfather, Thomas Phillips, was into antiques, and in June, he managed to get hold of an antique chair. My dad's younger brother, Tony, brought it to our house and my dad did it up by sanding and then varnishing it. They sold it and split the profits three-ways. In July, me and a friend, who lived across the street, camped out in his garden for the first time. I didn't go on holiday that year. I hadn't been abroad by 1990 or even visited London. Both of these events occurred in the naughties, so as far as I was concerned in 1990, they were in the distant future.

I celebrated my 14th birthday on Monday 20th August. I went for a meal to a pub that was demolished in the early 2000's called the Wharncliffe. Three days later, for the first time, I deliberately provoked, and wound up, a man who was a bully, who lived on my street. Between late August and early October, I was in the habit of getting up at about 5am and going for early morning walkabouts. On Tuesday 18th December, I was bought an Amiga computer by my parents for Christmas. I had it until the Autumn of 1996, when it packed in.

We had a brilliant Spring weatherwise and a very good summer in 1990, though a wet and stormy winter. Friday 3rd August was a scorching day and temperatures reached 98F in Cheltenham, though they were about 93-94F where I live. On Saturday 4th August 1990, I slept at my Grandmother's house, where we watched the Queen Mother's 90th celebrations on TV. I remarked to my Grandmother, "I wonder if she will make 100?". My Grandmother (Then three weeks off her 73rd birthday) answered with "If she doesn't make 100, I won't make 74". Seventeen years later, on my Grandmother's 90th birthday .... I phoned her up to wish her happy birthday. She said thank you. I then said, "Just think, if you live another 10 years, you will get a congratulatory telegram from the Queen". She replied, "Yes, if the Queen is still alive then!".

Liverpool won the league title for which has, so far, been the last time for them to do so to date. Liverpool looked on course for the double, but Crystal Palace knocked them out of the semi-finals in a thriller held on Sunday 8th April. On Saturday 5th May, Leeds United and Sheffield United were promoted to the old Division one. Hooligans purporting to support Leeds United rioted at Bournemouth, where they won 1-0. I dread to think how they would have reacted had Leeds Utd lost! Manchester United won the FA Cup 1-0 in a replay, five days after a thrilling 3-3 draw with Crystal Palace that was held on Saturday 12th May. On Friday 8th June, the World Cup started in Italy, and in the first match, Cameroon beat the holders, Argentina, 1-0! England reached the semi-finals, before being beaten on penalties by West Germany on Wednesday 4th July. That match is also famous for Paul Gascoigne being booked, and his tears. West Germany beat Argentina in the final. Germany became a unified country in October 1990.

On the evening of Thursday 4th January 1990, one of the funniest sitcoms, at least in my view, in UK television history started - One Foot in the Grave. I didn't see that series. I didn't start watching it until series three, though I have seen the first two series since.

On Sunday 11th February, Nelson Mandela was released from prison in South Africa after serving 26 years inside. That very day, James Buster controversially defeated Heavyweight champion Mike Tyson. On Saturday 31st March, there were massive anti-poll tax riots in London. The following day, Sunday 1st April, there were the Strangeway Prison riots in Manchester. On Thursday 2nd August, Iraq invaded Kuwait. On Friday 28th September, "Have I Got News For You" was broadcast for the first ever time. On Thursday 22nd November, Margaret Thatcher resigned as Prime Minister, to be replaced by John Major. The poll tax, low opinion poll ratings and splits over Europe brought her down. 1990 was also the year of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles craze. I was never into them myself.

In 1990, the Soviet Union still existed. In soccer there was no premier league. A lot of teams still played at dilapidated stadiums. Players weren't earning astronomical sums of money. You saved information on a floppy disk. There were no USB sticks. There was no mass usage of the Internet in 1990, certainly not in the UK. Mobile phones were large, cumbersome things, and hadn't gained popular currency. You didn't send text messages to anybody. There were no MP3 players in 1990. There was no Freeview. There was no single European currency. There were no DVD player's. Everybody used video recorders. There were no digital cameras. There were no plasma TV's. There was no Channel Five.

My parents didn't have a telephone in the house at the time. It was three years later, in 1993, when they got one. There were no mass Asperger's Syndrome diagnosises. I certainly hadn't heard of AS in 1990, and wouldn't for another four years. though some people had been diagnosed with AS in 1990. I was diagnosed ten years later.

In 1990 there weren't reality TV programmes, such as Big Brother or Wifeswap on TV, or Westlife churning out their dross. However, New Kids on the Block were around, and some garbage got to number one. Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikina by Timmy Mallet got to number one somehow, for four weeks. Looking at the number one list for 1990, there are three songs now that I can say I still like. Nothing Compares To You, which reached number one for four weeks on 3rd February, Vogue by Madonna, which was number one on 14th April for four weeks also, and Steve Miller's the Joker, which was number one on 15th September for two weeks.

It is certainly true that some things were better in the past. However, for me, the past is over-rated. I wouldn't want to go back and live in 1990 again. I am much happier in the present day, for all its faults and problems.

The 112-year-old marries the 17-year-old

2009-11-04T01:20:00.001Z

Last week it was in the news that an 112-year-old man has married a 17-year-old female in Somalia. If he is 112 years old, I wonder how much Viagra he uses! However, having read the report further, it stated that he apparently has 114 children. He obviously hasn't been in need of Viagra in his lifetime, if that story is correct!

I doubt if the man in question is even 112 years old. He probably doesn't even know how old he is, perhaps due to lack of education, but say if he is in his eighties, I still find it quite repulsive a man of that age marrying a 17-year-old. What would they have in common? I even doubt he has 114 kids. In Britain before 1837, people didn't register births, deaths and marriages, and 200, 300 years ago, the majority of people couldn't read or write, so many didn't how old they were or when their birthdays were. That is why old people would have exaggerated their ages in those times.

I remember years ago, when the late Anna Nicola Smith, then aged 26, married an 89-year-old Oil Billionaire. Howard Marshall I think his name was. He died a year later, of either old age or exhaustion! Smith said she loved Marshall and that his age was irrelevant. When my grandmother was 89 in 2006, I don't seem to remember many well-toned, 6ft 2in, 14st, handsome 26-year-old men proposing themselves to her. I don't know why. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that she was frail and lived (still does) in a three bedroomed house. She also wasn't a billionaire. I wonder what anyone else thinks?!!

Bonfires and Strikes

2009-11-03T08:13:00.005Z

It was on the news yesterday morning about dustbinmen being on strike in Leeds. The news coverage of it showed of rubbish piling up in the streets. I think they should throw it all on the bonfires this Thursday, so it won't be piled up and left to rot and fester in the streets.

Mind you, in fairness, you don't know why the binmen are striking or what over, so I am not knocking them. My dad, is a welder by trade but he has been a postman since May 1982. He still works, part-time, at Royal Mail, and he's been on strike recently, and trust me, the management there are crap. Crozier is paid £995,000 a year, and he's asking postmen, who are on much, much less to work conditions that he wouldn't work. You wouldn't believe what conditions they are trying to bring in, even though we live in rapidly changing times, with the advent of email and text. Change is inevitable. I accept that, but not on the terms of the Royal Mail management.

So whilst people moan and whine about strikes, you have to look at why people are striking. From a personal perspective, I just wish I could win that lottery, mainly for my own's sake, but also, so I could get my dad out of there - for good.

Modern Art reflects our society

2009-11-02T20:39:00.009Z

I admit the only thing I can draw is a pair of curtains, I am talentless as talentless is at drawing. I could draw a black line down the middle of a white canvass. I could pile up a load of bricks. I could can some excrement. I could gather up a load of rubbish. Where is the talent in that? Ask me to reproduce the Mona Lisa, or a Monet or a Constable or Turner, and I couldn't if you offered me 100 million dollars. I couldn't draw a landscape very well. That for me, is talent, and when it comes to drawing, I don't have it, but I could make it is a modern artist.

I admire paintings done by individuals such as Monet, Picasso, Di Vinci and Michael Angelo, or Constable and Turner. Paintings that require talent to produce them, and I admire talent in whatever area, discipline or field that it is in.

In 2006, someone called Rebecca Warren was paid £25,000 for five suitcases of rubbish. Also, someone whose name I can't remember, was paid thousands of pounds for a black line drawn the middle of a white canvas a few years ago. According to the abstractists, the line represented the doors of today, closed against the uncertainty of "Tomorrows world". I thought that programme had been taken off TV years ago!

An abstractist may say to me that I am not imaginative or intelligent enough to see the "talent" that lies behind a black line down the middle of a white canvas or a pile of bricks. If that is the case, then ignorance is bliss.

In modern art, if I emptied twenty pound coins into a gold fish bowl, I would be praised as protesting against capitalism. In the real world, I would be arrested for cruelty to animals, or thought of as a loony for wasting money. If I went on a load of tall buildings and had a shit on people below, I would be praised as representing the world in which the average person is shit on, but in the real world, I would be arrested or sectioned under the mental health act

Modern art reflects our society, in which talent is eschewed and swept aside in favour of non-talent. Style over content also predominates. It is seen with people like Jordan and Kerry Katona becoming stars. It is seen with the X-factor, with those twins getting through time and time again over more talented acts.

As for myself, I would hate being famous. I couldn't do with my privacy being intruded, photographs being taken of myself if I walked anywhere, or relentlessly being fired questions, often banal and trivial ones at that. I have done nothing with my life, or in my life, that merits myself becoming famous, and therefore, I am in the obscurity and oblivion that I richly deserve to be in. I wish others, such as Big Brother contestants, would follow suit.

Bullies occur everywhere

2009-11-01T11:53:00.017Z

In life, bullying is predominantly seen in mainstream school, most notably in Secondary School, but it can also occur in Infant or Junior schools, and even at sixth-form. It isn't even restricted to there. It can occur at work. Teachers can also be bullies, and so can adults. Bullies can be serial bullies. If the person they bully moves away, or goes to another school, or leaves the workplace, or moves to another shift, they will find a new target, because they have an antennae for who or what makes a victim. It is like they have an inner compulsion to behave in that way.

When I mention that adults can be bullies, there was such a man who lived at the bottom of my street. He is still alive. In July 1986, just before my 10th birthday, this person knocked on my door. My dad answered it to see what was the matter. This man complained to my dad that I had climbed up a tree half-an-hour before. My dad asked, "Has he? Is this tree in your garden?".

This bully/coward/saddo replied, "No, it is down the street, on the green". My dad then asked, "Why is it bothering you that he has climbed up a tree down the street? What's it got to do with you?". The bully snapped, "I don't know what's the matter with you, you never speak to me when I see you". My dad told him to bugger off back down the street or he would kick him down it! The guy who complained did exactly that!

A year later, this bully shouted at me for jumping on his flowers, when I had been at a school event. The woman next door, whose son this bully/coward/saddo also had picked on for several years, for no reason whatsoever, said that it wasn't me, but her son and his friend who did it. Normally I would condemn this sort of behaviour, but as it was done to him, it was justified.

This bully and coward also once emptied his dustbin, deliberately, which was three-quarters full of rubbish, in his garden. The guy who lived to the right of him, who died in December 1997, aged 72, saw him do it. He was a nice bloke, and he fell out with the bully/coward in the 1970's.

The bully/coward then blamed the two who lived next door to him, on the left, and said they had done it. They weren't angels by anyone's standards, but they did nothing to deserve the treatment he gave out to them. This bully then had a go at them over it. Another one of this bully/coward's party pieces was to put barbed wire on his fence, so no-one would touch it. He once had a go at me for calling for the eldest of the brothers and told me to stop calling for him, when I was walking up his path, as if he owned their house as well.

My last brush with this bully/coward came in August 1990. About a month before, he had got a no-ball games sign erected on the green. I was the instigator of this final clash, just as he went out of his way to get onto us in the past. I decided to wind him up, and asked the elder of the two brothers to start playing playing soccer, or football with a balloon. Predictably, the bully/coward marched down the path and roared at me "AYUP, CAN'T YOU READ? WHAT DOES THAT SAY?" in an angry voice. I replied, "Yes, I can read. It says "No Ball Games". It doesn't say anything about playing with balloons though, does it?". The bully/coward glared at me, but didn't reply, and instead retreated in the house! What was he going to do? Phone the police because I was playing football with a balloon?

He was a bully, because he went out of his way to get onto us when we were between the ages of seven and thirteen. He was a coward, because after the age of 14, he left us alone and never said another word to me or any of my contemporaries. I can also back up my assertion that he was sad, because if all he had to do in life was get onto children, then he should either have got a life, or topped himself.

In February 2008 this man said hello to me. It was the first time since August 1990 that we actually spoke to one another. I didn't insult him, but at the same time, I didn't speak. I just blanked him. Why should I speak to him? I don't like the bloke, and besides, even though it was a long time ago, he demonstrated that bullies are everywhere, and wherever they are, they must be stamped out, and not tolerated one iota.

Hypochondriacs often live the longest

2009-10-28T08:16:00.005Z

When I did my ECDL course in 2007, on it was this guy whose favourite topic of conversation was his illnesses, and all the operations that he had. He sat next to me, and mostly, he said his back hurt, his neck hurt, he had stomach pains and whatever else. Another thing he often said was how much he did for charity, and what a great guy he was, despite his suffering. Yet he went to the gym three times a week. If he could do that, he wasn't exactly at deaths door was he? It is actually often the case, that hypochondriacs live to be 104 years old and die in their sleep of old age. Whereas, those who really are ill in life suffer in silence.

Convention and Lunacy aren't far apart

2009-10-21T08:47:00.005+01:00

They say listen to conventional wisdom. Convention means nothing. Centuries ago conventional wisdom was that the earth was flat and that the sun went around the earth. Today's convention is tomorrows lunacy, or if you look at it from a different angle, todays lunacy can be tomorrows convention.

Numbers and Functioning

2009-10-20T13:07:00.007+01:00

I have, over the last nine-and-half years, being asked what life is like having Asperger's Syndrome. All I can say is I don't know what life is like not having it. It would be interesting to live a month as a NT, and then switch back, just to see the differences between the two. However, I am, as of yet, unable to do that, so I can't tell you what life is like having AS. This is all I know and it is all that I have ever known.

Another thing that I have always known is that the higher the amount of people around me when I am doing something, the more I struggle. When I have to interact with a great deal of people at once, my behaviour deteriorates and becomes erratic. I always fare better when there are less people around me. This is not because I am wilfully obnoxious or anti-social, but because I like to focus on what I am doing. I can become confused when a lot of people are around me at once.

That was one of the primary reasons why, though I didn't particularly like or enjoy my time at Junior School, I fared a great deal worse when I went to Secondary School. If there had been say, six hard-working, friendly and helpful pupils in a class, I would fared a lot better. It has been one of reasons why I have found it difficult to hold down a job, and is primarily one of the reasons why I don't go to functions or why I dislike parties. I also don't like fuss. My choices in life are I either do something that requires concentration and don't speak, or I speak and then bugger it up. Get it right and be accused of being rude, or get it wrong and be sociable.

NT's function on a multi-channel system. I function on a single or low channel system. Neither is right. Neither is wrong. Aspies are Aspies. NT's are NT's. However, I admit I prefer a multi-channel system of functioning. It can be a damned nuisance when you have my operating system. Trust me.

Imagine that you are a building with a PBX (private branch exchange) and you have, say, twenty lines to handle calls. But other buildings around you have as many as thirty or forty lines at their disposal. And your building is one of the 1.5% of the properties that has this call-capacity problem. You will be unable to handle all the calls that a 40-liner can handle at any one time, even though it may only have 25 incoming calls at that time. It has 15 lines free for information transfer outwards. The autistic person is like the 20-liner, in that there is this reduced capacity for information transfer in both directions which means that communication is difficult.

In life, I can be forgetful. This isn't because I am particularly absent minded or in the early stages of Alzheimer's disease, but because there are that many things going around me at times. On Tuesday 13th October I went to the gym. That was the final time I ever go with shorts that don't have covered pockets. I lost my locker key and though the manager opened it with a master key, I felt a bit of a Tw*t. Another problem occurs with me. When I am engrossed in something, everybody and everything else almost becomes irrelevant.

ASC's and ageing

2009-10-16T23:11:00.011+01:00

Stereotypes are for lazy minds. They reduce one's ability or capacity to think, and when one uses stereotypes, people are lumped into categories or boxes, and as a result, individual differences aren't allowed for or taken into account. That said, I have noticed, from my experiences at least, that as a whole, people with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome seem to age well, and often look younger than what they are.

At Secondary School, I remember some of the girls bragging about getting served alcohol in pubs at the age of 14. Whether they were telling the truth or not I have no idea. However, I do know that if I had gone into a pub at the age of 14 and asked for a pint of beer, I would have been laughed at! I was challenged about my age by a barmaid in November 1994, three months after my 18th birthday. I had to argue very hard to convince the barmaid that I was old enough to purchase intoxicating liquor at a bar.

This wasn't an isolated incident either. In January 1993, aged 16 years and five months, I tried to get served in a pub close to my home, and I was refused. Then, in March 1994, I tried to get into a nightclub for the first ever time, and was turned away. I succeeded a month later, but I never have cared for nightclubs, and don't go to them nowadays, so I guess it was of no great loss to myself.

Theories I have for this, if true, are that perhaps Aspies and Autistic people are less likely to smoke, binge drink alcohol. As with regards for getting into illegal drugs, they are unlikely to have the social contacts in order to do so. Perhaps they age as much as NT's. Perhaps I am simply going on my own observations and experiences. Perhaps there are Aspies and Autistic people out there who do look older than their chronological age.

Learning and Information Procession

2009-10-05T11:26:00.000+01:00

I always learn better when I teach myself how to do things, as opposed to other people learning me, mainly because they can, or have been know to go to quick for me to process information at their rate, or because my mind and learning is ahead of theirs. Some people in the past have either called me a genius or stupid. In fact I am neither. Just that they have misunderstood me, my condition and my thought processes.

The purpose of the welfare state

2009-10-04T19:17:00.002+01:00

The "experts" in the media often say that the welfare state was never designed to be a lifestyle choice. I couldn't agree more. It wasn't, but that was in the late 1940's, 1950's, and 1960's, when jobs chased people, not the other way around. Back then they thought they would have got rid off severe recessions such as now forever. At the moment, the safest jobs are working at job centres, being debt collectors or undertakers. Who's going to employ disabled people when non-disabled NT's with 30, 40 years work experience find it impossible to find work? Of course some reforms are inevitable, but what do they suggest, bring back the workhouse?

The Sun Newspaper

2009-10-01T08:38:00.040+01:00

I learned on the six-o-clock news last night that the "Sun" newspaper, owned by Rupert Murdoch, is going to support the Conservative Party in the coming general election, which is almost certainly going to be held in May 2010.

Though Murdoch, the papers owner holds hard-right views, the "Sun" has refused to endorse the Conservatives in Scotland, because they are unpopular there. If the "Sun" had told its readers in Scotland to vote Conservative, sales could have drastically declined, just as they may have in England and Wales if they had taken this stance for the 1997 General Election.

You may think that this stance represents a damascene conversion of a newspaper that has finally had enough with a tired and discredited government. Think again. Despite what the "Sun" might tell you, this decision was reached because Murdoch now a USA citizen, and who hasn't paid income tax in the UK since 1987, thinks that the Tories are going to return to power. The "Sun" was not a radical, socialist tabloid for the previous 45 years. It unequivocally and vociferously supported Margaret Thatcher during the General Elections of 1979, 1983 and 1987, and the Conservative party between May 1979 and November 1990. It vehemently supported the police and the Thatcher government during the 1980's miners strike, and made misleading or even outright false claims about those on strike.

The Sun strongly supported the introduction of the controversial Poll Tax and labelled those attending public protests opposing the tax as "thugs". It fiercely attacked those who opposed Margaret Thatcher in the November 1990 leadership contest in which she lost power. Though it frequently expressed its disillusionment with John Major after Black Wednesday, the newspaper repeatedly called the implementation of further right-wing policies and promotion of hard-right ministers, with leaders such as attacking the government for not going ahead with Post Office privatisation (November 3, 1994) and demanding social security cutbacks, with leaders such as "Peter Lilley is right, we can't carry on like this" and "We want more of the Redwood, not deadwood", and calling for Michael Portillo to become Prime Minister.

As late as January 1997, the Sun attacked the planned "Windfall Tax", calling it wrongheaded. Then a month later, it attacked the National Minimum Wage and Social Chapter. By this stage however, it was blatantly clear that there was no chance of the Tories returning to power, so it switched sides to Labour, who were proposing many of the policies the "Sun" was attacking! Four years later, the Tories went into the 2001 General Election with a hard-right manifesto. The manifesto of the Tories during that election campaign, and political views held by the "Sun" were almost identical. It was a case of spot the difference. Yet the "Sun" backed centrist Labour as opposed to the hard-right Tories. Why? Because the Tories were unelectable in 2001, and the "Sun" would have been seen afterwards to have called for the election of an unelectable rump

I am a solidly working-class Aspie. No matter how rich or successful in life I become, or how far I sink, I will always be working-class, and will always be an Aspie. Both are essential ingredients of my character. I am not a middle-class "Guardianista". Far from it. I come from a mining and steel community. However, because I am working-class, I resent how I am stereotypically supposed to read newspapers like the Sun and Daily Star.

What makes the Sun think that it holds such great influence anyway? We live in a multi-channel, Internet age. 2009 isn't the 1980's. If anyone does vote for a political party because a newspaper tells them to, then they are dense, ignorant and stupid beyond belief.

Here are some other examples of the "Sun's" lies or two-facedness.

* Attacking Benny Hill for having topless women on his shows whilst having topless teenagers on page 3! I didn't find Benny Hill funny but that to do that strikes me as gross hypocrisy

* In 1983, during the general election campaign, the Sun ran a front page featuring an unflattering photograph of Michael Foot, claiming he was unfit to be Prime Minister on grounds of his age and appearance, as well as his policies, alongside the headline "Do You Really Want This Old Fool To Run Britain?". If the Sun had attacked Foot's policies, then its attack could have been credible, but it was personal. Foot was born on Wednesday 23rd July 1913, so he was nearing his 70th birthday when this personal attack occurred. Even Margaret Thatcher blocked a proposed advert by Saatchi and Saatchi referring to Foot and his age, saying that it was "Too personal".

A year later, in 1984, the Sun made abundantly clear its very strong support for the re-election of Ronald Reagan as president in the USA. Reagan was born on Monday 6th February 1911. So if Foot shouldn't have been elected as Prime Minister on account of his age, Reagan shouldn't have been re-elected as President on account of his age either.

* In April 1989, the "Sun" wrote, four days after the Hillsborough stadium soccer disaster, in which 96 football fans were crushed to death: "Some fans picked pockets of victims"; "Some fans urinated on the brave cops"; "Some fans beat up PC giving kiss of life". The story accompanying these headlines claimed that "drunken Liverpool fans viciously attacked rescue workers as they tried to revive victims" and "police officers, firemen and ambulance crew were punched, kicked and urinated upon".

I am not the most socially skilled person in this world, but even if this had really happened, and it didn't, publishing a story detailing it, only four days after the disaster had happened, was tasteless and insensitive in the extreme. Even I can F**king see that. The Sun apologised in July 2004, but to this day, many people in the Liverpool area refuse to buy the Sun as a matter of principle, and the paper's sales figures within Merseyside are even now, very poor.

* In July 2003 the Sun lied about Asylum Seekers killing Swans and planning to eat them. All swans belong to the Crown. Injuring or killing one means a £5,000 fine or six months in jail. I am against mass, uncontrolled immigration. I am against it even more now we have a severe recession, and any asylum seeker committing a crime must be deported as soon as s/he has finished their sentence, but I am also against lies told about asylum seekers.

* On Monday, 22nd September, 2003, when the ex-World Heavyweight champion boxer Frank Bruno, who had been admitted to hospital after suffering a breakdown, the Sun carried headlines saying "Bonkers Bruno Locked Up". However, they changed it to "Sad Bruno in mental home" due to an adverse public reaction.

The "Sun" purports to be a working-class paper. It isn't. It has, for the last 30 years at least, supported policies which have mainly benefitted the elite in society, and have harmed the poor and working-class. It showed its working-class credentials recently, when it told the Postmen to return to work and stop striking!

Whatever the faults are of this present government, and they do have a few, I remember what it was like when the Tories were in power in the 1980's and 1990's, with 3 and half million unemployed, the poll tax, the destruction of communities with mining, steelworks and mill closures, attacks on local government, single parents, massive tax cuts for the rich, all of which the Sun vehemently supported. The Sun said that money would tricke-down from the rich to the poor. However, human nature is very selfish, and it never really happened.

Under the Tories there was no minimum wage, no free bus-pass for the over 60's, no free TV licenses for the over 75's, free-market policies, agency workers not being paid holiday pay and sick pay, no government intervention, and an internal NHS market. All of this will either go or return when the Tories will probably return to power, and there will be further cuts in the welfare state, and public spending, to pay for tax cuts for recession causing bankers and the rich. Yet the Sun is telling the working-class to vote for this? The irony of this of course, is that the working-class will suffer through such measures.

Working-class paper? My arse, as Jim Royle would say. More like a hard-right, war-mongering, big business supporting, union-hating, bigoted (Pulpit poofs and bonkers bruno), unprincipled, lying rag.

Communication

2009-09-30T00:05:00.003+01:00

I prefer it when people speak to me, that they do so in a clear, direct, concise and precise way. All rambling, vague or unclear directions or language does is either confuse me or makes me lose interest. When someone is giving me instructions or speaking, I prefer it if they break it down, so I can digest what they are saying, rather than listen to rambling speech that jumps from topic to topic. This is not because I am stupid, or a GLDer, or rude, but because when I have mentally digested one aspect of what the speaker is saying, I find it hard to switch straight away. I can switch, but am slower at doing so than NT's are.

I prefer language that is free of metaphors, cliches and idioms. I don't take offence at people's frankness if it is clear, constructive, and doesn't mean they are wasting my time. What I find difficult to understand is when someone asks my opinion and I tell them, they then take offence. Why bother seeking an opinion if it offends you? What sort of logic is that? By nature and instinct, I have to say things as they are, rather than what others like to hear. That's who I am and what I am about. I can comform to an extent, but I feel two-faced and hypocritical doing so.

I have listed the Plain English Society's link to my website's list of links http://www.plainenglish.co.uk/

Gender and Sex

2009-09-29T09:13:00.001+01:00

Such is hypocrisy in society about sex. When a man sleeps with loads of women, he is called a stud and a stallion. When a woman sleeps with loads of men, she is called a slag and a tart. What's the difference?

Colds and Fitness

2009-09-28T21:52:00.013+01:00

In 2006, 2007 and up to June 2008, when I got a cold, it lasted nearly a month, but since June 2008, I haven't had literally one day of illness. Perhaps I have exhausted all my colds in those three years! More seriously, my physical fitness reached its nadir between March 2006 and December 2007.

I have gradually improved it since then. I have lost, so far, 22 pounds in weight since October 2008, so perhaps improved fitness and weight loss has something to do with it. I lost a stone in eight weeks, in late 2008, by cutting out junk food alone. I was at my peak regarding physical fitness between 1994 and 1999. When I got a cold then, it would last three days and that would be the end of it.

I now weigh what I did around the time of my diagnosis, and am hoping to get down to my weight, when I was weighed on Monday 30th November 1998, (Doctors surgery information obtained recently). I am 1.82cm (5-feet-11 and a half inches tall). My physical fitness levels now aren't as good as they were between 1994 and 1999, but they are the best they have been since, again, the time of my diagnosis.

Is there a link, or is it just coincidence?

Sleep and location

2009-09-27T00:45:00.004+01:00

I don't know how people can fall asleep on busses, trains and planes. The only place I can truly fall asleep in is my own bed.

Years ago, around 1992, 1993, I used to think Sunday was a totally boring day. It almost certainly would have been in the days when everything was closed and people did nothing but go to Church. However, times change, and I find that I rather like Sundays nowadays. I see it is a day when I can regain my mental equillibrium and relax after the stresses of the week. A routine I usually have is going to bed after dinner on an afternoon, and having a sleep.